Mommy Wants Vodka » Blog Archive » Sometimes There Are No Words. Only Awesome.

Sometimes There Are No Words. Only Awesome.

January7

How did you guys not tell me this existed until YESTERDAY?

Furthermore, HOW DID NONE OF YOU BUY ME THIS?

You Shut Your Whore Mouth When Dr. House Is Talking

On second thought, don’t buy me this. I’d NEVER sleep again. Ever. In fact, I may never sleep again knowing that it exists: I have more questions than can possibly be answered.

THIS is why mommy wants needs vodka.

posted under Why Mommy Needs Vodka, You Shut Your Whore Mouth

70 Comments to

“Sometimes There Are No Words. Only Awesome.”

On January 7th, 2011 at 10:43 am Devan @ Accustomed Chaos Says:
That. Is. Awesome! … and creepy!
On January 7th, 2011 at 10:44 am Pbpdesigns Says:
Now, see, if I had known this existed I would have TOTALLY gotten it for you… Pass the vodka!
On January 7th, 2011 at 10:45 am Neeroc Says:
That is fucking awesome! Except it should totally be one of those little pillows rather than framed.
On January 7th, 2011 at 10:46 am Becky Mochaface Says:
That’s creepy.
On January 7th, 2011 at 10:46 am Kristin Says:
Holy Shitballs I had NO idea it existed. Apparently I don’t Google enough. Or I am selfishly Googling things for ONLY ME!! But had I known it existed it would have been bought for your fake birthday, Christmas, Hanuka, Kwanza, New Years, We now Have mardi Gras Easter. There is still time.
On January 7th, 2011 at 10:47 am Megan (Best of Fates) Says:
IT IS LUPUS!

Oh, House, when will you ever learn?

Silly, silly house.
On January 7th, 2011 at 10:48 am Beth Says:
I want one. No, two, cuz I should probably give at least one away. I mean, obviously this would be the best gift EVER 🙂
On January 7th, 2011 at 10:51 am Amy Says:
Thats kinda creepy but hilarious at the same time!
On January 7th, 2011 at 10:56 am Sunday Says:
Now that is some creepy shit alright!
On January 7th, 2011 at 10:58 am Allison Says:
Linked to you today, because your frat house post brought back young boys with penis memory. Thanks for that…
On January 7th, 2011 at 11:10 am Crystal Says:
hahahaha!! YIKES!

Oh and I love that the button to post says “hit me, yo!” Thats total awesomeness right there!
On January 7th, 2011 at 11:19 am Rebecca Says:
I wouldn’t sleep because that piece of art looks haunted.
On January 7th, 2011 at 11:21 am Layne Says:
I MUST have the pattern for this!!!
On January 7th, 2011 at 11:28 am Halala Mama Says:
bwahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa!! I didn’t buy it because I knew you needed your sleep!!
On January 7th, 2011 at 11:29 am JenniferB Says:
I’m sorry, I think that is utterly full of the Awesome. If I knew it existed I may have selfishly snagged it for this insane mess I call my house.
On January 7th, 2011 at 11:30 am Jennifer Simson Says:
“Bless this House” is a sweet ass saying, but I think it really needs a platitude. It isn’t good enough for you without one.
On January 7th, 2011 at 11:33 am Ruth Says:
A very close friend does some great cross stitch of robots, Star Wars, Dr. Who, and so forth. She made a Star Wars wedding sampler for my husband and I (really, vows *should* include “Do or do not. There is no try.”).

Look up krupp:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/krupptastic/sets/72157614432044697/
http://www.mrxstitch.com/2009/05/04/stitchgasm-krupps-forbidden-love/
On January 7th, 2011 at 11:33 am leanne Says:
Oh my God. Wow. I like to cross stitch. And I like House. I’m a little afraid of the two of them combined however.
On January 7th, 2011 at 11:37 am stacey@Havoc&Mayhem Says:
hhmmm…no…no no no. That’s just wrong. I cross stitch. But some things just should not be done that way
On January 7th, 2011 at 11:44 am Erin@MommyontheSpot Says:
This. Is. Awesome.
On January 7th, 2011 at 12:04 pm mumma boo Says:
That has cured me of any desire to EVER cross-stitch again. I bow to it’s creepy awesomeness.
On January 7th, 2011 at 12:25 pm Kelly Says:
Someone clearly has too much time on their hands.
On January 7th, 2011 at 12:44 pm Josefina Says:
It’s mine. I already licked it.
On January 7th, 2011 at 12:45 pm MidLifeMama Says:
I like the little butterflies around his head. That is a nice touch.
On January 7th, 2011 at 12:51 pm Tweets that mention Dr. House Cross Stitch Sampler. | Mommy Wants Vodka -- Topsy.com Says:
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Aunt Becky and others. Aunt Becky said: It's clear that I need new friends because NONE of you told me about this: http://bit.ly/gpYryH […]
On January 7th, 2011 at 1:20 pm M Says:
That is a creeper stare if I’ve ever seen one.
On January 7th, 2011 at 1:29 pm Lenetté aka The Shitzizle Says:
this rocks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
On January 7th, 2011 at 1:50 pm Twitch Says:
It’s things like this that make me proud to be a crafter… this and the Two Man Tree Saw of Doom I made my daddy… Check it. http://i144.photobucket.com/albums/r200/violetmorrow/I%20do%20my%20hookin%20on%20the%20Sofa/DSCN1902-.jpg I crocheted that.
On January 7th, 2011 at 2:03 pm Jane Lively Says:
creepy crafty! Have you seen this Amy Sedaris book? Simple times: Crafts for poor people?

Hilarity.

http://www.amazon.com/Simple-Times-Crafts-Poor-People/dp/044655703X
On January 7th, 2011 at 2:38 pm Mel Says:
This would be WAY better, if instead of bees or butterflies or whatever is flying around him, it would be a cane and a few random pills. Don’t you think??
On January 7th, 2011 at 6:33 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:
I can’t decide. I really can’t. It’s all so glorious.
On January 7th, 2011 at 2:40 pm Melissa Says:
That is like CLOWN scary.
On January 7th, 2011 at 6:33 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:
Clown-on-velvet scary.
On January 7th, 2011 at 2:52 pm Crystal Says:
OMG! I want one…not for me but for my Boy! He LOVES the DR and his witty mouth…this many just change his mind!!!
On January 7th, 2011 at 6:18 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! If you buy one, I want to see his reaction. I’ll post it on here. I want a video of it. I think we all need that kind of awesome in our lives.
On January 7th, 2011 at 3:07 pm Lynn MacDonald (All Fooked Up) Says:
Somehow…even with all our best friend sleepovers and secret handshakes and shit, I never realized that you were a creepy House Sampler kind of gal. How did that never come up? Had I known, UPS would have had that baby on your wall by Christmas. Just saying…
On January 7th, 2011 at 6:18 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:
I want one with something more random on it. I mean, THAT is random, but like “Pants are BULLSHIT,” or something.
On January 7th, 2011 at 3:37 pm Barbara Says:
I want
On January 7th, 2011 at 4:03 pm Kori Says:
We neither told you nor bought it for you because that is too creepy! I mean, cross-stitch is something the DEVIL thought of.
On January 7th, 2011 at 6:17 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:
BWAHAHAHAH. Will you cross-stitch that for me?
On January 7th, 2011 at 4:41 pm Jenine Says:
I love it!
On January 7th, 2011 at 4:57 pm SaucyB Says:
dude, it’s never lupus. lol
On January 7th, 2011 at 6:17 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:
It really is NEVER lupus.

You know what? I want THAT on a cross-stitch.
On January 7th, 2011 at 7:42 pm bekaboomn Says:
this is the awesomest fucking thing I’ve ever seen!
On January 7th, 2011 at 7:42 pm bekaboomn Says:
this is the awesomest fucking thing I’ve ever seen!
On January 7th, 2011 at 7:46 pm SharleneT Says:
Of course, I would have bought it for you — but, chances are, it would not have been sent, because it would have fallen and stuck against my wall at approx. eyeball height (shit like that happens around my house!) but it’s the thought, right?

Oh, just changed my blog to a domain address at http://mainstreamsolarcooking.com in case you want to fix your link.
On January 7th, 2011 at 9:25 pm Lanita Says:
OK, even my 12 year old loved this one. We LOVE a good House marathon!
On January 7th, 2011 at 9:44 pm Jana A Says:
Omg I’m dying laughing!! And you know why!
On January 7th, 2011 at 9:44 pm Jana A Says:
Omg I’m dying laughing!! And you know why!
On January 7th, 2011 at 10:17 pm Aunt Juicebox Says:
*weeping* because I did not know…
On January 8th, 2011 at 12:41 am GingerB Says:
Probably it is best you don’t have it as a pillow because your fake cat would just shed its nasty fake hair all over it, and maybe even pee on it. Things are safer this way.
On January 8th, 2011 at 1:07 am Wendy Says:
Love it!!! Must buy!!!!
On January 8th, 2011 at 1:18 am beta dad Says:
The butterflies are key. Without them it’s just creepy.
On January 8th, 2011 at 3:56 am Kisha Floren Says:
Gotta love Regretsy! I was fully prepared to drop the hundred bucks required to own such a masterpiece for my kitchen, but they were sold out. bitches.
On January 8th, 2011 at 7:12 am Lily Says:
Whatever it is: At least it’s contagious.
On January 8th, 2011 at 7:45 am Sandra Says:
You’d sleep again…after you put it under a bathmat or in a dumpster.
On January 8th, 2011 at 12:44 pm pattypunker Says:
this has me in stitches.
On January 8th, 2011 at 12:51 pm Krista Says:
Please tell me you found this on Regretsy?
http://www.regretsy.com/
On January 8th, 2011 at 7:10 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:
Hahaha! No. But I have a friend who did.
On January 8th, 2011 at 3:27 pm Bodaciousboomer Says:
Please tell me that’s Photoshopped.
On January 8th, 2011 at 7:10 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:
God, I wish I had the talent. I WISH.
On January 8th, 2011 at 7:00 pm Suniverse Says:
That guy is fucking scary faced.

I’m in the process of making this:

http://www.subversivecrossstitch.com/kits/whore.html

I think of you as I cross stitch.
On January 8th, 2011 at 7:11 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:
I heart you madly. Also, I own it. (I have a crafty Prankster!)
On January 9th, 2011 at 7:14 am Jenn Says:
1) Your blog is screwing up, or my computer is. Either way, I do not like it.
2) For some reason I googled “john c mayer” this morning and you were results number 1 and number 2.
3) I miss you.
On January 9th, 2011 at 11:20 am Dorothy Says:
Shouldn’t it say “Bless this Vicodin?”
On January 9th, 2011 at 11:56 am Kadye Says:
What if I said I did buy you this, but it’s the only thing scaring the ghost away at the theatre I work at so instead it’s posted by the light board so he (or it? what pronoun do you use for ghosts?) won’t mess with the lights anymore.
On January 9th, 2011 at 10:08 pm MamaCas Says:
That thing is 20 different shades of awesome!! The only way it could be better is if it were BEDAZZLED with hot-pink rhinestones!
On January 10th, 2011 at 7:39 am sam {temptingmama} Says:
I think I’m gonna get this one made for me. http://www.etsy.com/transaction/41236862

I NEED IT. BADLY.

Also? House is sold! Imagine that.

Also? Craftastrophe is so gonna feature these amazing pieces of work.
On January 10th, 2011 at 8:17 am Karen Sugarpants Says:
We featured these over here: http://craftastrophe.net/2011/01/aunt-becky-awesome/ and hat tipped to you, Mama! 🙂
On January 10th, 2011 at 10:24 am fernvalley01 Says:
Hi there , this is totally of topic for this post, but I wnated to pop on and say thanks .I have spent some time reading the “band Back together” blog that you have created and I applaud you and all the writers for a wonderful work! I spent a long time reading and have found it to be quite cathartic.I am a 43 yr old woman who suffered 2 micarriages and no succesful pregnancies,Iam unable to get pregnant now and if I should by some wild chance the liklyhood of a positive outcome is very low. and have currently been approved and waiting to adopt for ove 3 yrs.The miscarriage posts were so helpful in that ,while family and friend support , no one really talks about the experience , and lord knows we need to sometimes talk about the awful parts too.So healing.