Mommy Wants Vodka

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So Boring I Might Barf

September20

Since I’m now unable to really do the haircut/color thing that I normally do when I’m in dire need of a change (pregnant Aunt Becky = Oompa Loompa + Short Hair = Pinhead), I’m going to revamp my blog. I’m going to hire a graphic designer and tweak the shit out of this.

I bring this question to you, dear reader: in an effort to provide a list of things I want/don’t want, I need to figure out what is irritating to the reader. So, lovers, what makes a blog design annoying?

posted under You Are SO Boring
50 Comments to

“So Boring I Might Barf”

  1. On September 20th, 2008 at 5:07 pm Kyddryn Says:

    Flashy, blinky, slow-down-the-page-load stuff.

    Ads that pop up when you roll over them, then take an act of Congress to close so one may read the blog one is visiting.

    I bet I could think of more if I tried…but I won’t.

    Shade and Sweetwater,
    K

  2. On September 20th, 2008 at 5:08 pm Deb Says:

    for me it’s something yo dont have presently. i do not like the blogs that have music. its somewhat assaulting when you click on and have to listen to elton john (whom i dont dislike) at ear splitting levels while hunting for the device to turn it off/down. and no matter that i know joe blow has the music, i invariably forget and get assaulted repeatedly. blasted music machines – they’re the debbil i tell you, the debbil!!!

  3. On September 20th, 2008 at 5:12 pm MsPrufrock Says:

    No bright colours, no text colour which is hard to read against the background, not a lot going on in the sidebar(s), no blinking shit, and not too many graphics that mean the page takes ages to load.

    I’m done now.

  4. On September 20th, 2008 at 5:14 pm The Mommy Says:

    I hate when you have to scroll left to right to read the damn thing. I like using the wheel on my mouse, which doesn’t go left to right. I actually decided NOT to read a blog this afternoon because of this. I guess maybe it’s a pet peeve.

  5. On September 20th, 2008 at 5:26 pm Queen-sized funny bone Says:

    when the colors are too dark and the print is so small you get a headache trying to read it.

  6. On September 20th, 2008 at 5:37 pm Marinka Says:

    Dark background makes it hard to read, but possibly that’s because I have old lady eyes. I don’t like it when websites are too “busy”, either. Or when it doesn’t offer me a snack when I load the page.

  7. On September 20th, 2008 at 5:56 pm giggleblue Says:

    music. i hate the damn music.

    shit that takes forever to load.

    too much over crowded crap.

    thanks for asking!

  8. On September 20th, 2008 at 5:57 pm mrs.spit Says:

    Music that loads. I HATE that. . . .

  9. On September 20th, 2008 at 6:25 pm Heather Says:

    I like your blog, just the way it is 🙂 Like PP have said, no blinkies, no music, no weird colours!

  10. On September 20th, 2008 at 6:38 pm Meg Says:

    I hate those gif-type pictures of women with handbags walking along a city skyline.

    I love you, Becky, but I hate the fact that I have to scroll across to see your kitten image.

    I like: archives that have a drop-down box. Images isolated on white. Interesting fonts. Clean lines.

  11. On September 20th, 2008 at 6:38 pm trish Says:

    I hate blogs that are too busy, i.e. when they have EVERY SINGLE AWARD on their sidebar, etc.

    I hate it when blogs only provide the first few sentences of their post in a feed…you don’t do that now, but please don’t start. 🙂 I’ve kind of decided not to visit any more blogs that make me click over to their blog.

    I’m sure there’s more, but I’d have to look at a horrible blog to list what I don’t like…

  12. On September 20th, 2008 at 6:47 pm tash Says:

    MUSIC. Please for the love of god, NO MUSIC.

    I could also be spared a cartoon image of you. I’m sure the real you is just fine if you feel so compelled.

    Mine is so boring I could also barf, but I need some inspiration. suggestions welcome.

  13. On September 20th, 2008 at 7:01 pm Madame Yu See Says:

    You don’t have any links to the blogs you read. I find that boring.

  14. On September 20th, 2008 at 7:14 pm elle michelle Says:

    SUCK: Internal scroll bars, music, super-big or super-small fonts, chaotic graphics, lack of any design (clinical use of whites, for example), nonsensical color palette, black background with white/pink/blue/any colored font

    RULE: Clean lines, clear sections (posts vs. archives vs. bio box vs. blogroll, etc.), matching color scheme, lighter background with darker text, a dose of personality without being obnoxious

    I read most blogs in my reader, so even though I shared opinions here, it hardly matters to me. If a blog’s good, I read it regardless of how shitteous the design is.

  15. On September 20th, 2008 at 7:33 pm Andy Says:

    I hate when the text is over some background picture, who can read that?

  16. On September 20th, 2008 at 7:41 pm kate Says:

    i feel assaulted when music blares at me. and goofy fonts. god almighty don’t get any goofy fonts.

    and NO PINK.

    and no swirly stuff.

    or flowers.

    basically, make it like a guy would.

  17. On September 20th, 2008 at 7:42 pm goteeman Says:

    um, the ones that drive me batty are the ones so freaking busy, or so close on contrast where the text is that you can’t read them…
    make it readable, with a big enough font… and not too busy…

    J/ (goteeman.blogspot.com)

  18. On September 20th, 2008 at 8:13 pm Holli Says:

    I use Google Reader, so I wouldn’t even know if you changed it. I agree with a PP. I hate the ones that only show a few lines of their blog on reader so you have to click over. Lots of time I don’t end up reading. The only time I really visit a blog is to leave a comment.

  19. On September 20th, 2008 at 8:28 pm Sarah Says:

    Not a fan of colors that break my eyes or absurdly small type. Other than that.. I don’t feel qualified to suggest anything based on the sad state of blahnes of my own blog.

  20. On September 20th, 2008 at 8:32 pm Jenn Says:

    Neon & music.

  21. On September 20th, 2008 at 8:33 pm swirl girl Says:

    I love reading blogs. So much so that I have lost track of my kids, responsbilities, current world events, and my butt has become chair shaped.

    Can you design a blog that I can read and comment on like a blue tooth cell phone headset?

    Cuz that way- it would be like Blog on Tape..and nobody would complain about my pink, swirly, award -laden site. (snark, snark)

    just sayin’…

    http://www.swirlgirlspearls.blogspot.com

  22. On September 20th, 2008 at 8:48 pm Stacey Says:

    I like the way you have your 3 columns set up, the post loads first so if you have a widget hanging up in the other 2 columns it doesn’t interfere with my reading.
    I don’t like bright busy backgrounds and I really don’t like music.

    But in the interest of full disclosure I usually read blogs in bloglines so I don’t see the columns & the graphics or hear the music.

  23. On September 20th, 2008 at 9:07 pm heather Says:

    Rainbows and unicorns? You start pumping this place with rainbows and unicorns and it may not go so well, you know?

    Also, I have to agree about the background graphics imbedded beneath the text. Other than that, I’m not too picky.

    And I want to see your lovely pregnant self in photo, if you please. ‘Kay?

  24. On September 20th, 2008 at 9:08 pm The Milk Maid Says:

    As long as it dosent take the page 27 minutes to load on my super duper faster computer then have at it Aunt Becky!

  25. On September 20th, 2008 at 9:26 pm SciFi Dad Says:

    Bad:
    – variable widths
    – main column wider than 500-600px (unless text is multi-columned)… long lines of text = bad
    – white/pale text on dark background
    – animation, autoload music
    – archives longer than 10 lines (roll them up with a dropdown or something)
    – low contrast hyperlinks against plain text (like say black and taupe, cough)

    Good:
    – blogroll/reading list/recommended links
    – favourite/best posts

  26. On September 21st, 2008 at 6:23 am -seraphimred Says:

    I agree with the above. I also think when bloggers have posts that are ‘locked’ for whatever reason, really suck. I mean, if its that personal, why blog about it? and before ya’ll get all snarky on me…’its for family! .blahblahblahblah……!’ That’s why God invented the telephone, mail, email, and texts for! If its something that could come back and whoop ya…why do it?

    I know of more but I can’t function right now…been up all night with a screwed up back. Tylenol can suck my husbands saggy nuts.

  27. On September 21st, 2008 at 7:28 am birdpress Says:

    I love your blog Becky, but the only thing I don’t like about the format is when you have to scroll within a page, like with your header image, and occasionally on blog posts, although I haven’t seen that recently. I like to just use the scroll thing on my mouse instead of having to click inside another box on the screen to scroll within a screen, you know?

  28. On September 21st, 2008 at 7:45 am Tiffany @ My Random Wisdom Says:

    music=bad.

    I don’t like hard to read fonts and dark color schemes..
    alot of animated graphics is bad..
    and having to scroll across the page to read anything..

  29. On September 21st, 2008 at 8:36 am rayne of terror Says:

    I don’t like white font on a black background, too small font, or long load times. There are some popular and well written blogs that I refuse to read because the feed is partial and the page takes for ever to load. CHicky chicky baby is one I can think of. I do read Mom 101, but not every post, because of the load time.
    I don’t like variable width blogs because the photographs overlap the advertisements.
    I do like a search blog feature. Sometimes I know I want to see that post that mentioned a certain Italian restaurant in Chicago again.

  30. On September 21st, 2008 at 10:20 am James Says:

    Hi, I found your blog on this new directory of WordPress Blogs at blackhatbootcamp.com/listofwordpressblogs. I dont know how your blog came up, must have been a typo, i duno. Anyways, I just clicked it and here I am. Your blog looks good. Have a nice day. James.

  31. On September 21st, 2008 at 11:39 am Lola Says:

    Oh, good luck! I’m in the middle of that nightmare, and it’s making me cranky. Every time I think I’ve got the right color, it’s all wrong.

    Even though I’m not a huge fan of black backgrounds, that might just be the way I’m headed at this point, because it’s easy and it goes with everything.

    I’m not a huge music on blog fan, and I hate anything flashing. All white is safe but boring. Sidebars full of ads and awards don’t turn me on either. Small print is my biggest peeve for sure.

    In reality, though, if I like a blog’s content, I’ll read it regardless of whether it annoys me. Everyone’s got different taste, and I think it should reflect your personality. Mine’s going to look like a f’ing nightclub at the rate I’m going, cuz I loves me dark colors!

  32. On September 21st, 2008 at 4:14 pm christy Says:

    this has nothing to do with design – but I detest it when I have to verify myself via a code before making a comment – it is so annoying

  33. On September 21st, 2008 at 4:18 pm Melissa Says:

    I agree with all of the above, but Becky.. why can’t you cut/colour your hair??? Last I heard the professional colours are perfect safe while you’re PG… especially after the first trimester!

  34. On September 21st, 2008 at 5:00 pm baseballmom Says:

    music, avatars, too many ads, twitter (some I visit, or used to, had only twitter blurbs on them now, and I had to click to get anywhere), irritating text colors

  35. On September 21st, 2008 at 5:25 pm Michelle Says:

    Not a big fan of music or colors that make it hard to read.

  36. On September 21st, 2008 at 5:42 pm honeywine Says:

    I just want to be able to see the type without a microscope or having to highlight it (which sometimes happens with dark or patterned backgrounds).

  37. On September 21st, 2008 at 6:04 pm foradifferentkindofgirl (fadkog) Says:

    I’m a fan of clean lines and organization. I get freaked when it feels like I’m being assaulted visually when I click on a blog with blinkies and graphics that are just out there.

    I also want to add my name to the list of those who hate the music! I love music. You like music. We all like music. I don’t like clicking to a blog and being blasted with someone’s music and freaking the hell out as I try to scroll all over the place to find the player so I can click it off!

    I also like to be able to read the entire post in my Reader. Most of the blogs I read now are set up for that, and the couple that aren’t, I adore the author, som I’m going to go their blog anyway, but it seems as if I can be more efficient if I’ve read the whole blog post in the Reader.

  38. On September 21st, 2008 at 6:39 pm Danielle Says:

    I’m not picky. Well not about blogs anyway. I can’t wait to see the new and improved mommy wants vodka! Will the new design come with a coupon for a vodka martini? Cause THAT would be AWESOME!!!!!
    -D *ICLW*

  39. On September 21st, 2008 at 7:09 pm Kate Says:

    Ummmmmm.
    Hard to read fonts, or fonts that blend to much with the background are annoying…music is annoying….foo foo background designs, with ribbons or plaid …they suck it.
    That’s about it I think.
    ICLW

  40. On September 21st, 2008 at 7:22 pm Io Says:

    Oh, I agree with everyone about music. I hate going to site not realizing my speakers are on and suddenly getting blasted with music.

  41. On September 21st, 2008 at 8:20 pm Ellie Says:

    Loud music. I.e. the consensus.

    Um, Oompah-Loompah?

  42. On September 21st, 2008 at 9:58 pm sara Says:

    I love new designs! I think the only thing that I don’t really care for is when the text is difficult to read (like because of the color or background?) Then again, maybe I just need to get glasses, LOL! But basically I love new designs – as long as I can still read the entries. Good luck with yours and I can’t wait to see the new design – although I do like your current one as well 🙂

  43. On September 21st, 2008 at 11:02 pm Painted Maypole Says:

    i am not a fan of music on the blog because I cannot listen to anything with words AND read at the same time.

  44. On September 22nd, 2008 at 7:16 am mumma boo Says:

    Annoying = music, foofy designs in the background, hard-to-read fonts, too many ads, clutter in general

    Not annoying = clean lines, easy to read, easy to navigate. Um, basically the layout you have now! 🙂

    But, heck, lady, go crazy. It’s your blog! I’ll still be back to visit even if you do choose Oompah-Loompah orange for a background, and Oompah-Loompah green for the font. Throw in some psychedelic fonts and we’ll all be tripping with you. Heh.

  45. On September 22nd, 2008 at 9:51 am erin Says:

    i just don’t like music…..or fonts that are difficult to read!! guess i am really easy to please…..can’t wait to see this fancy new blog design!!

  46. On September 22nd, 2008 at 10:42 am Badass Geek Says:

    Nothing is more annoying than Fran Drescher.

    As long as you don’t have an image of her or soundbites of her suicide-inducing cackling laugh, you should be good.

  47. On September 22nd, 2008 at 3:06 pm kbrients Says:

    I thought that you just changed it?

    What ever you like my dear— I will read it Sam I am….

  48. On September 22nd, 2008 at 4:16 pm Brooke Says:

    The only thing that drives me crazy is when the font color is too light (or annoyingly neon) to read. I really cannot forsee you adding a font that is florecent pink.

    Can’t wait to see the new design!

  49. On September 22nd, 2008 at 11:14 pm Collette Says:

    Oh, how fun! I rearrange my furniture when I get bored. But, um, I am guessing that is out for you too. Anyway, I was reading your blog with P sitting next me a few weeks ago and she was quite distraught over the monsters chasing the kitties. I laughed and love the “God Kills Kittens” stuff but she wasn’t too thrilled. So, consider it a suggestion from P.

  50. On September 25th, 2008 at 1:15 am Joseph Says:

    I agree on the no music please chants.
    I do not like a whole lotta junk all around on the page. makes me feel like I am shopping circuit city online.
    I am sorry but not a big cat fan and would prefer to see another picture for the top of your blog, please please please (don’t ban me for this, I can’t help it, really, I am still considered interesting by many, I think…)

    really want to see a good blog roll. when I can’t sleep at night, like to see what my favorite bloggers are reading and find new places, but please check it sometimes, so like 50% aren’t broken links / dead / gone blogs. THAT is really annoying to me. I personally like the bookshelf that Kate does, I think it’s her.. datinggod.blogspot.com I think…..anyways. I love to see what youre reading. I am a reader……(lots of us must be,. duh).
    ummmm…..no real bright colors, not too many many colors, picture of you and kids and even daver once inawhile, might be nice.
    like links sometimes to good video on you tube, etc.
    but just sometimes. NOT all the time.
    don’t even know what some of you mean by where else you read the blog than the damned internet. clearly I am behind.
    i like pictures of what food someone is eating, but maybe that is weird to others. I like food. a lot.

    i agree, don’t do the 10 words and then i have to click to REALLY read the post. that annoys.

    keep it easy to reply with comments. that’s fun if you don’t make me do 10 things first. cause then i am really annoyed, and that means I either won’t comment or will be tinged with irritation all through my comment, lose lose.

    there was one blog somewhere with really really good quotes on the left in a simple box that kept rotating. like 35 really really good quotes. I liked to go there, when depressed / lonely / bored/insomniac, and see those, and see what new ones came. you have to do it simply inside the text there, and make it not too fast or too slow, but just right. then it’s really cool and enriching and warm and nice.

    i like you a lot how you are — sans cats, sorry.
    peace.

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