Mommy Wants Vodka

…Or A Mail-Order Bride

…Love, Your Aunt Becky

February25

While I should have been working on meaningful things like meeting deadlines and washing floors, I’ve instead been infatuated with the idea of finding free pictures online and turning them into HILARIOUS greeting cards. Because that is what I do with my time: worthless things!

Also, my line of cards has a name. “Love, Aunt Becky.” Because OBVIOUSLY.

posted under Aunt Becky Has VD
58 Comments to

“…Love, Your Aunt Becky”

  1. On February 25th, 2010 at 12:35 pm Kim @ Beautiful Wreck Says:

    Comedy!!! I think the Easter Bunny one is my favorite!

  2. On February 25th, 2010 at 12:37 pm stacey@Havoc&Mayhem Says:

    I love the first one, especially since our forefathers certainly blew things up and got loaded. FREEDOM!!!!

  3. On February 25th, 2010 at 12:39 pm Becky Mochaface Says:

    “Jesus your ass has gotten fat” HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

  4. On February 25th, 2010 at 12:39 pm Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] Says:

    Yeah for blowing shit up!

  5. On February 25th, 2010 at 12:41 pm Mama Says:

    When you gonna start printing? Sign me up for this shit. I gotta have some, I love them. I know just who I could give them to…

  6. On February 25th, 2010 at 12:44 pm Cupcake Donna Says:

    LOVE these!

    Quick, we need some for St. Patty’s Day.

  7. On February 25th, 2010 at 12:45 pm Andrea Says:

    LOVE the 4th of July one!!

  8. On February 25th, 2010 at 12:46 pm Titanium Says:

    I. Want. To. Own. These.

    Name your price. Wait, these are freakin’ priceless. Holy crap, Becky.

  9. On February 25th, 2010 at 12:49 pm Vinomom Says:

    I like the one about the cupid’s fat ass. 🙂 It’s all good clean fun to me!

  10. On February 25th, 2010 at 12:53 pm Patty Punker Says:

    ha! love the “is it too late for an anulment?” one. reminds me of war of the roses.

  11. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:03 pm a Says:

    Could you put the “Jesus, your ass has gotten fat” on a copy of The Last Supper? Or the picture (I don’t know if it actually exists or I’m creating it by combining things in my head) where Jesus is standing with his arms outstretched and there’s Apostles (or just regular people, whatever) at his feet? It’s almost Easter, and I think that holiday needs a bit of levity!

  12. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:06 pm Marie Says:

    Aunt Becky, could I please steal your awesome card ideas and send them to my family?? I’m not sure if they could handle actually visiting your site, or knowing that I do everyday.
    Thanks!

  13. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:08 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:

    Hells yes. Take them!

  14. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:14 pm injaynesworld Says:

    Lovin’ those. See what you can accomplish by not sleeping?

  15. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:15 pm Tracie Says:

    Doing housework is like bailing water with a leaky bucket and the deadlines can wait. These are a meaningful contribution to society. And full of The Awesome.

  16. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:23 pm The Mercurial Wife Says:

    My favorite is the annulment one! Got me crackin’-a-lackin’…

  17. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:24 pm swirl girl Says:

    And yet another new career for you!

  18. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:32 pm Rebecca Says:

    The first one was my favorite. You’re great! Thanks for spending your time making cards that make me smile.

  19. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:39 pm mrs ellenoy Says:

    LOVE the skull sketch.

  20. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:46 pm Sara @ Life With the Two Says:

    Can I get a yearly box set?
    I”ve got 37 birthdays, 15 anniversaries, and a big ass Christmas card list. Get on it woman!

  21. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:52 pm Christa Says:

    That Easter card must be mass produced! The world needs it.

  22. On February 25th, 2010 at 1:53 pm MommaKiss Says:

    I agree, we need some St. Patrick’s Day cards. Most likely about too much green beer and Shepard’s pie.

  23. On February 25th, 2010 at 2:00 pm Dr. Dre Says:

    I LOVE these. I have already sent some to my coworkers. Bitches.

  24. On February 25th, 2010 at 2:06 pm existentialwaitress Says:

    I particularly like the Valentine’s card – I’d like to give that one to the hubs right NOW in fact.

  25. On February 25th, 2010 at 2:19 pm Lucy Says:

    Waaaaaayyyyy better than Hallmark!

  26. On February 25th, 2010 at 2:45 pm The Other Melissa Says:

    You had to print these after Valentines Day? I love number 3. I may even send it now as an after Valentines Day pre it’s our anniversary on the 28th and sometimes you drive me up a f’ing wall card. Get these copyrighted. You could make millions. My idea, I’ll only need 10% of your profits :)-

  27. On February 25th, 2010 at 2:46 pm Brae Says:

    I don’t really have anything to say except that this cracked me up! LOL!

  28. On February 25th, 2010 at 2:47 pm Jennifer B Says:

    Bunnies with eggs, seriously folks? That is some fucked up shit. What kind of crack were “They” smoking when they came up with this? How does it have anything to do with Easter? Why do they have greeting cards for these holidays anyway? Birthdays, sure – but St. Patrick’s day? Is this a day I need to be “greeted”? Why does my sister-in-law think that she needs to send 3 separate cards (one to each kid and one to my husband and I) for each of these holidays? What is up with all the effing greeting cards? If I love someone I just tell them. I don’t spend 4 freakin dollars on a damn Hallmark. Now if they were more like Aunt Becky’s cards…. that’s another story. I might actually pay money to tell someone their ass is growing fat. 🙂

  29. On February 25th, 2010 at 3:16 pm Mwa Says:

    🙂

  30. On February 25th, 2010 at 3:40 pm Andrea Says:

    The skeleton cupid is my fave!

  31. On February 25th, 2010 at 5:16 pm Zonie Says:

    Things like this are why I love your blog.
    So it’s not COMPLETELY worthless.

  32. On February 25th, 2010 at 5:58 pm Megan Says:

    Seriously, can you make these cards happen? I would totally buy them. I wish there would have been a birthday card in there somewhere that I could give to my husband on his big day next week…….

  33. On February 25th, 2010 at 6:25 pm Tara Says:

    Nice! That is the best idea ever! Btw, that Easter bunny is kinda creepy.

  34. On February 25th, 2010 at 6:44 pm zelzee Says:

    You always make me laugh!!!

  35. On February 25th, 2010 at 7:00 pm Kristin Says:

    Is it ok to admit I have a full blown girl crush on you after seeing these cards?

  36. On February 25th, 2010 at 7:16 pm steenky bee Says:

    This reminds me of a Valentine’s Day inspired tweet by one of my favorite tweeters, @aedison:
    Roses are red, and so is my blood. You haven’t been returning my calls, I MADE YOU A GIFT.

  37. On February 25th, 2010 at 8:03 pm Jennifer Says:

    I think you’re on to something. I’d like to send a few Get Well Soon cards to with my sincere best wishes that certain people will soon pull their heads out of their asses. I’m just afraid it would go right over their heads (hah!).

  38. On February 25th, 2010 at 8:33 pm Sharon Says:

    I am totally stealing the Easter Bunny card for my sister. I once sent her a card with Jesus on the cross and a thought bubble that said, “TGIF” *. Been looking for another Easter card ever since. Thanks!

    * Even more fun given that she was living in a university residence run by nuns.

  39. On February 25th, 2010 at 9:04 pm linlah Says:

    Yeah that blowing shit up is my favorite part and maybe the getting loaded part too.

  40. On February 25th, 2010 at 10:01 pm mumma boo Says:

    Woman, you are a genius. An evil freakin’ genius. Love ’em!

  41. On February 26th, 2010 at 1:19 am GingerB Says:

    As a point of inspiration, I once gave out cards with an Easter Bunny handing Christ on the Cross an egg saying “Have an egg, you’ll feel better.” i bought every card the store had and will in all likelihood go to hell, via express.

  42. On February 26th, 2010 at 4:19 am Krissa Says:

    Sweetie, you are so screwed up… 😉

  43. On February 26th, 2010 at 8:29 am 6512 and growing Says:

    Um, new career, because OBVIOUSLY!

    You’ve been tagged, check my blog.

    xxoo
    Rachel

  44. On February 26th, 2010 at 10:16 am Kelly Says:

    So funny, I’d buy them all.

  45. On February 26th, 2010 at 10:26 am Ms. Moon Says:

    These are darling!

  46. On February 26th, 2010 at 10:29 am Zakary Says:

    This is genius.

  47. On February 26th, 2010 at 6:01 pm moonspun Says:

    and OBVIOUSLY you are hilarious! These are great!

  48. On February 26th, 2010 at 9:12 pm panamahat Says:

    Love ’em

  49. On February 27th, 2010 at 3:17 pm SoccerMom Says:

    Those seem right up my alley! Let me know when you start selling them. I would buy them.

  50. On February 27th, 2010 at 10:14 pm Mel Says:

    Seriously, there are a ton of places you could market these. I’m still willing to be your business manager.

    This would be another step for Aunt Becky to take over the world! 😉

  51. On February 28th, 2010 at 7:09 pm Michelle Says:

    Oooo I like the last one. Some of those Valentine’s cherubs are pretty creepy though, don’t you think?

  52. On February 28th, 2010 at 7:33 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:

    They’re all wickedly creepy. If falling in love is anything like that, I WANT NO PART OF IT.

  53. On March 1st, 2010 at 4:09 pm Kristine Says:

    I like the 4th of July one, but I think Ic ould probably also use a few of those Valentine ones too!

  54. On March 2nd, 2010 at 4:29 am Marita Says:

    Not worthless at all and so much better than Hallmark online options!

  55. On March 2nd, 2010 at 12:42 pm magpie Says:

    You need a publisher. These are getting better and better.

  56. On March 8th, 2010 at 8:12 am Kendra Says:

    Those are fantastic! Now I’m just trying to think of who I could send them to!

  57. On March 15th, 2011 at 1:49 pm Lauri Says:

    You are a girl after my own heart! I love your site – so much fun!
    I’m adding your link to my website 🙂 thanks for the laughs!

  58. On March 15th, 2011 at 2:33 pm Your Aunt Becky Says:

    *blushes* Aw, FANKS.

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