Mommy Wants Vodka

…Or A Mail-Order Bride

Like Rock of Love (sadly) Without The Trannies


When I am interviewed by all of the groupies that live inside my head, one of the questions they invariably ask, besides, of course, do small people have to have their houses custom made so that they can actually cook at the stove, and the infamous, why do dogs eat each other’s poo, is this: why do you blog?

In fact, while I was at BlogHer, I was interviewed by a woman, who, no doubt, felt sort of sorry for me, standing there all bewildered and obviously confused (me, not her) while people darted around me for free pens and samples of detergent, who asked me that very same question: why do you blog?

Unlike when I am asked why I like McDonald’s so much that I might trade one of my kids for a cheeseburger, or why I find Diet Coke to be Nature’s Miracle, I had an answer other than “just because.” It’s one of the few things I can actually answer without having to send them to The Daver.

Hey, I never said I was smart.

Because blogging? Kind of a funny thing when you stop and think about it. I can tell you that it’s not for the fame or notoriety or fame or legions of screaming teenage girls on my lawn. If there does happen to be a gaggle of giggling girls (alliteration much?) near my house, it’s probably because they are hopped up on hormones and trying to get the teenage boys that live on either side of us. Not because Their Beloved Aunt Becky lives there.

(I’m pretty sure teenagers shouldn’t read my blog.)

And shit, anytime I meet a new person and they ask what I do, rather than say “I am a slave” or “I retired several years ago” I feel like I should acknowledge that I do manage to throw something up on a website most days of the week. 500-1200 words a day, pithily typed into a nifty wordpress box, published with nary a thought to The Edit Button.

Technically that’s writing. So is the book proposal I conned some gullible agents into schlepping around to publishers. Which means I could theoretically call myself a writer, which is what The Daver does (calls me that, I mean along with “Fuckface” and “Baby.” He is not a writer), but being A Writer conjures up an image of someone who can properly construct a painstakingly perfect sentence. I imagine A Writer in a chunky cream fisherman’s sweater, sitting in a room with “nice lines” (whatever the fuck that means).

I don’t own a fisherman’s sweater anymore and my room is decorated in kid chic, pretty much the antithesis of “clean lines” and well, I can hardly type out 200 ill-thought out words without having to get up and remove a marble from someone’s orifice. I peck out words between dirty diapers and dream of working quietly although I know fully well that if I tried to go into some silent office to write, I’d have to bring the kids just for some background noise.

So, being A Writer isn’t really what I do.

But what would you think if I introduced myself as A Blogger? Because to me, A Blogger probably looks like he (or she) crawled out of Middle Earth, cupcake frosting glued to her leg, teeth furry with green growth, a fancy camera attached to his (or her) wrist. I have a terrible time telling people proudly that I Blog, not because I’m ashamed of what I do–it IS work and I DO have integrity in what I do–but because it’s a lot of work to explain it so that someone else would understand.

As I was bombarded with this throughout the whole conference, I am well aware that soon enough, most people will have an idea of What Being A Blogger Is, because The Power Of The Blog is obvious in all the attempts for marketers to court We of The Blog.

Probably a good 75% of the blogs I read devote a couple of posts a month to doing reviews, and sadly a lot of ones that I do not read are turning into what appears to be a long press release. This seems to be what marketers want personal blogs to turn into.

But I write here because that is simply what I do. Every day–because if I skip a day, I find it nearly impossible to pick it back up–I come here, pluck out a post, and I write. I’ve done it for years and I will continue to do this until I am done. And when reach the end, I will stop.

I suppose that what I do is somewhere in the middle between A Writer and A Blogger, and while I am conflicted by quantifying what I do, I have no issues explaining why I do it.

First, I cannot stop. I write because I have to. On days that I’ve written something ahead of time and have set it to auto-post, I spend all day feeling out of sorts. Like I’m missing a toe or a finger or a kid or something and I can’t place why until I realize that hey, y’all, I didn’t write.

I write because I must.

Secondly, and probably most important, is that I write and I blog and I read and I comment and I tweet and I Facebook (who knew THAT could be a verb?) because I like people.

When the decision to stay home was made for me, I found myself miserable and alone. I’d gone from a place where I excelled at what I did, I took pride in myself and I did the best job I could, gal-darn-it, I was good enough, smart enough, and well, people liked (or hated) me, to being at home with Ben, my strange son, where no one noticed if I did an exceptional job at scrubbing out a pan, or was particularly efficient about cooking dinner.

I went from having a life to living for other people. And the adjustment was brutal. I was lonely, I was isolated, I felt like my life was turning into a should-have-been.

Years later, I am generally pretty happy to do what I do most days, and somedays, of course, I would happily sell my children UNDER COST WITHOUT A COUPON to a band of roving gypsies and run away with the circus, but mostly, I’m happy. Part of the reason for my happiness is because I’ve met a ton of people whom I now call friends. I have a life, albeit one that exists in the computer, but it’s mine and it’s what I’ve got.

So amidst the circus that was BlogHer, I stood there, while a confused woman in a snazzy suit held a voice recorder thingy in my face (probably regretting approaching me) and I told the tiny box that I blogged because to me, it was all about the community. And it is.

Why do YOU blog?



Because who can resist those rolls? She’s like a mini version of me!


And despite being INCREDIBLY crabby today, you can see that Alex is getting better. You can also see that Alex likes to eat markers AND draw on my arms. Goofy ass kid. Thank you for thinking of him–he was very, very sick.

posted under Cheaper Than Rehab
107 Comments to

“Like Rock of Love (sadly) Without The Trannies”

  1. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:08 am Blogging – Posts about Blogging as of July 28, 2009 | Says:

    […] are able to see my blog updates almost instantly – rather than me putting up a link […] Like Rock of Love (sadly) Without The Trannies – 07/28/2009 When I am interviewed by all of the groupies that live […]

  2. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:17 am Nancy Says:

    I guess I blog because I feel like I sometimes have something to say. And because it amuses me, and really that’s all that counts!

  3. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:28 am Notesfromthegrove Says:

    I STARTED blogging as a way of keeping friends and family up to date about my husband’s adventure with the Army National Guard. It ended up morphing into it’s own little collection of stories, pictures, thoughts, and new friends. I love it. I love having a recording of my life out there…I don’t know, it just feels good.

    So glad to call you one of my friends here.

  4. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:35 am Kelly Garner Says:

    I don’t blog

    I’m a blog supporter, which I think is much more attractive than one of the “Athletic” types

    On to my reason for this comment

    I wonder, if we all wrote to Becky’s publisher(future?) and said we wanted to pay for our advance copies of her book(which I know will be brilliant) if it would nudge them in their decision making?

  5. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:42 am Nicole Says:

    i blog so that the words don’t kill me. when I get them out on the blog it’s totally different than saving it in a wordfile. Even if people don’t respond – it doesn’t matter – my perspective changes. And I’m loving reading other peoples thoughts. I find myself affected by people (who I’ve never met – like you!) and finally NYC is a lonely place…

  6. On July 28th, 2009 at 10:46 am Mrs Soup Says:

    It’s all about the people.

    And I am totally stalking you down and going to scream outside your window ala teenage girls for the Beatles, *NSync, Jonas Brothers. Someday. Just wait.

    And anyone who says they blog for any other reason is probably lying to themselves, at least a little bit.

  7. On July 28th, 2009 at 10:46 am MK Says:

    I blog because it’s cheaper than therapy. No doubt. I also just love to write. I have no idea what’s “in it for me” other than getting words out, and I really love going back and reading stuff from months or years ago. I’m funny ๐Ÿ˜‰ And it’s the real me.

  8. On July 28th, 2009 at 10:50 am Jenn Says:

    I blog because it’s sometimes the only adult interaction I get all day. I blog because I like writing and always have. It’s a journal too. I think at the speed that I type; my handwriting is much slower and I end up skipping words or whole thoughts.

    I think I blog, too, because I feel like my story needs to be told. And I’m the only one who can tell it.

  9. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:02 am Employee No. 3699 Says:

    I started because my husband travels 50% of the time and it was something to do. I continue because I, too, have made some awsome friends.

  10. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:03 am a Says:

    I’m glad Alex is getting better – have they tried to track down the source of the problem?

  11. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:10 am Your Aunt Becky Says:

    He got a mosquito bite on his eyebrow and I think he rubbed his disgusting blankie into it. Which I sterilized later, but that blankie is just, BLECH. And, of course, I can’t replace THAT blankie and it’s his favorite. Also? GROSS.

  12. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:05 am Tina Says:

    I blog because I have to get it out. I get very little social interaction and 99% of my friends live in my iPhone. I blog (badly), tweet, facebook, chat, read blogs on iPhone. It would be nice to have a couple of readers though so I don’t feel so much like I’m talking to myself.

    I have been blogging since 2004, I think. I have lost count of how many blogs I have had though. Hoping this one sticks!

  13. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:10 am Bluebird Says:

    I started blogging because it calmed the voices in my head. No, really – if I write it down, I can “get it out” and move on. And it’s absolutely necessary that I type, since my handwriting is illegible even to me, plus typing is so much faster.

    I figured as long as I was typing I’d “put it out there” – and quickly it became that I blogged for the community as well. In a weird way, it’s a rare chance to choose your friends – read who you want, comment where you want, talk about those subjects that interest you (and that might not interested those you known IRL). It’s a strange but wonderful place, this blogosphere.

    So glad Alex is feeling better.

  14. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:11 am Bluebird Says:

    Wow. Typing and grammar in that parenthetical freaking suck. My apologies!

  15. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:12 pm Potty Mouth Mommy Says:

    I was the laziest blogger ever- I started out because it was like a light in the dark- I’d started reading blogs of people going through similar circumstances, and thought, “hey, this makes THEM feel better, why not me?” But I wasn’t truly addicted- not yet.

    And then the crap circumstances got a whole lot worse- and the support I received was overwhelming. I truly felt a part of the community, and that people TRULY understood what I was going through- and they CARED. They cared enough to send comments, and to send MORE people to send comments. And all for the purpose of helping me through one of the darkest times in my life. I still get kinda choked up thinking about all of the people who helped me through it, and if just ONE of my blog postings or comments helps make someone’s day just that little bit brighter- or makes them feel like they aren’t completely alone- I’ll count myself successful.

    And… sorry that was so long… I suck at this commenting thing!!

  16. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:12 pm Potty Mouth Mommy Says:

    PS: Your kids are so cute I could gobble them up with a spoon!!! omg!!

  17. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:13 am amandakayhill Says:

    I blog because it’s fun and I like to write, and the requests for book recommendations were getting out of hand.

    Plus, I’m a touch narcissistic. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  18. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:21 pm Kristina Says:

    I blog because everyone in my real life just didn’t seem to get me. Shit, I’m not sure I get myself, but writing is helping me figure it out. I blog because I have found some wonderful people whose 1 and 2 line comments on my posts life me up and help me not to feel so alone. And I blog because I love to write, I might not be totally, horridly awful at it, and I want to improve.

    P.S. You should starting carrying around your Funniest Blogger award, and when people ask you what you do, just whip it out (the award that is) and say “I’m the world’s funniest blogger, bitch. That’s what I do.”

    And, Alex might be the coolest kid ever in that AC/DC shirt.

  19. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:23 am DG at Diaryofamadbathroom Says:

    First of all, let me commend you on the awesome AC/DC tee shirt on Alex. THAT’S how you dress a toddler, y’all.

    I’m with you on the “have to” part of blogging. Once I started, it was more addicting than crack. I actually paid 18 dollars for 15 minutes of computer time to update my blog from a business center in a Marriott once, while away for the weekend, because I just HAD TO. Those that blog, get it. Those that don’t . . . sorry for them.

  20. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:23 am The Mommy Says:

    I blog because I like to talk and some days I feel like the computer is the only one that I can get to listen. Also it keeps me from having to repeat the same story about the kiddos over and over and over. And over. I can just tell someone to read it already! With color photos! Unfortunately that can backfire because I can’t really bitch about family like I want to…

    For me, the “community” of the whole experience is a bonus…like when you play the lottery and you think you won $1 but it was actually $100 (true story). THAT kind of bonus…

  21. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:24 am Caron Says:

    I blog to keep up with friends and family. I stop and then when at least 3 people actually say they miss my blogging (shock), I start up again. It amazes me that they want to read. One blog ended when my dad died. I just couldn’t keep that up. I am a self-stifling sort of person and could only really let loose on an anonymous blog, but I really try to be open. It is difficult for me to let people I know read what I REALLY want to say.

    I don’t seek an audience for my blog because it is easier to deal with the low readership if I honestly do nothing to try to be funnier than I am (I’m mostly an in-person kind of funny) or draw attention to myself (also something I excel at but only in-person). Like Tina, I have been blogging for years and have been through a few of them. I have saved Tina’s blog for reading just for that reason. I will read your blog, Tina!! viva la Tina! (I don’t speak French, even in person).

  22. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:31 pm Badass Geek Says:

    I started blogging because I needed a place that I could dump all the stories I think about on a daily basis. Blogging then changed from wanting a place to write, to NEEDING a place to write. Like you, I just need to do it.

    It staves of the insanity.

  23. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:37 am Coco Says:

    Alex looks loads better – I’m so glad he’s on the mend!

    Markers are like crack for toddlers, I think. Badger often colors his feet with markers; I suspect it’s an attempt to fool me into thinking he doesn’t need shoes.

    I blog because I love to write and I love to meet interesting people – but I’m very shy, so online works best for me. If only I lived closer to my blog-found friends. It’s so hard to get together for lunch from four states away.

  24. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:47 am Dana Says:

    I blog to fill the gaping hole left by trying to be all things to all people and neglecting myself. I blog for validation. I blog to speak my voice in a “safe” environment. I blog to attempt to shatter public stereotypes of a 45 year old woman.

    But mostly? It’s a creative outlet – some place where I can be me without feeling so vulnerable.

  25. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:47 am GingerB Says:

    I am strangely addicted to the blogoshpere considering I work full time and have children. I would write more but I can’t stop reading everyone esle’s stuff.

    This is what I wrote about why I blog and read blogs:

    where I pimp Aunt Becky and some of my favorite blogs to read.

    And btw, I want to squeeze Amelia’s thighs.

  26. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:48 am ainebegonia Says:

    Glad Alex is doing better, be glad it’s only regular markers. My girls always found the permanent ink type and would draw on themselves with them. It takes about 3 days to wear off while constantly scrubbing their skin raw.

    I blog because sometimes I have something I just want to get out of my head.

  27. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:54 am amy d Says:

    My reason for blogging has evolved, if you will. I began “blogging” when I turned 30 and discovered I was pregers with baby #1. Never one to be a chatty cathy on the phnoe, I used the blog to get updates to my divorced parents who live in different states.

    But after awhile, a creative and artsy person emerged and I discovered I REALLY enjoy writing. Even better, I enjoy people reading what I wrote, even if it’s about my cat crapping in places he shouldn’t.

    Now, I blog to be a part of this amazing community. I love keeping up with people’s daily lives, who I’ve never met, but have become my friends. I mean I was totally on pins & needles, checking your blog every 5 seconds when you began the alli thing! Yes, it has become an addiction! Blogging…a much cleaner addiction than crack and meth…no?

  28. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:55 pm Anjali Says:

    Alex looks so much better, thank goodness!

    I blog because it’s fun. And it makes me think about things.

  29. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:56 am Angie Pangie Says:

    You know, I don’t really get the whole community thing from my blog. The people who read my blog don’t often comment. At first I thought no one read my blog and that I was a giant looser, but then I started looking at the stats and I realized that folks were reading. I do like online communities, but I get that from FB and some from a few Yahoo Groups I belong to.

    Why I do it? I do it because it’s the best way I’ve found to share my recipes. I feel awesome when someone emails me and says “Thank you! I love this recipe!! It’s JUST what I needed!!”

    Also, it proves to my Dad that he didn’t waste his money on my culinary arts degree nearly 20 years ago. And yes. I still care what my Dad thinks.

  30. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:58 am Cassie Says:

    I started blogging mostly because I didn’t know anyone IRL who was pregnant/had babies and I felt alone. I needed an outlet. I had been reading your blog and a few others for awhile when I realized that I could write my experiences, that I could ask questions when all of the baby books were confusing and the doctors were sucky and I didn’t know where else to go. When my friends were tired of me complaining (and I was tired of the looks they were giving me) about stretch marks and all of the other lovely things that come with being 8 months pregnant, I just started writing. And I do consider a lot of my blogging buddies to be friends of mine even though I’ve never met them b/c when it comes down to it, they’ve helped me out with advice or encouragement in times when a lot of my IRL friends wouldn’t even have a clue what I was talking about.

  31. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:05 pm Leadia Jarvis Says:

    I wanted to be a writer for my entire life but my parents held my college tuition hostage until I decided on something more sensible like Marketing. But I still had those fisherman sweater, writer-dreams too. When I quit corporate America to stay home and raise kids I felt like I was going insane, so I started paper journaling just to feel like an adult again. When I developed massive pre-partum psychosis during my 4th preganancy and was relegated to an outpatient nut-house, they suggesting journaling to cope with all of my emotions. That turned into blogging and one of my “real” writer friends invited me to LiveJournal to hang with her and other “real” (published) writers because she knew how much I loved to write and hoped it would encourage me to take my talents more seriously (ha!). I still hope to be a REAL WRITER some day. In the meantime I read other writers voraciously and when I teach first grade I tell my students that learning to read and write is what gives you your voice and finding your voice is a powerful thing.

  32. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:05 pm Mimi Says:

    I’m not sure I’m part of any blogging community – yet. Maybe the community in my head (who actually hang out with the gaggle of giggling girls in yours).

    I blog because I like to write, but I’m way too ADD to write a book. Also, the Internet is my own personal padded room with a punching bag.

    Kisses to Alex.

  33. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:06 pm Vinomom Says:

    I blog anonymously, and I mean strictly anomously, because sometimes people just know too much about you to give you an honest opinion. Or maybe you don’t want an opinion you just want to bitch. So for me it’s a creative outlet that is all my own. My friends know I blog (and I have trouble saying it proudly as well, cuz they sooo don’t get it) but they don’t know how to find me. I hope.

    I think sometimes, just to keep up with people, my posts do turn into a long press release of what I’ve been doing. Sometimes I just need to write something so people know I’m still alive. And when I’m generally happy my thoughts don’t go that deep. Or I’ve had too much wine to actually ponder anything that would make sense in the written word.

    I’m glad I found you Aunt Becky. And I hope your writing takes off. When people ask what you do, just tell them you are the Master of the Universe. Yours at least.

  34. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:15 pm Kristin Says:

    I started blogging to save my sanity when I was dealing with infertility and I continued blogging because I love the support and friendship I have found.

    And, I am so damned glad I’m not the only one who threatens to sell their kids to the gypsies…only I threaten to call 1-800-GYPSIES R US

  35. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:16 pm kbrients Says:

    oh dear! Alex is getting to be such a bigger boy ๐Ÿ™‚

    I blog to remember my life…

  36. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:18 pm calliope Says:

    I fucking LOVE that you are sharing more photos lately. Just had to say that before my brain forgot.

    now- WHY blog? totally nodding my head in understanding and agreeing with you. In fact Briar and I were just e-mailing about some of this stuff – you know the morphing of blogs into something that is more than/other than writing.

    Like you I write because it is a need. And I know that if I step away from it something inside me will atrophy and shrivel up. Also like you I am pretty much a home body and the people on the otherside of this computer monitor are my link: to friendships, conversations, education…and more

    Mostly I write because I don’t want to forget. I started what can safely be put in the box of “TTC blog”. I wanted to write about the experience of trying to get knocked up. And lawd knows that took a long ass time. And along the way I realized that I needed my blog to chronicle other stuff.

    And then I started writing about taking care of Grandmother, and depression, and infertility, and being know. life and shit.

    And if no one ever read my blog or left me a comment I would still write because if I don;t get it out I will suffer.

    (and PLEASE send me one of your fancy pants business cards so that I can take a crazy photo with it and make you smile!! You have my mailing address, right??)

  37. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:31 pm Amanda Says:

    I started blogging because I felt alone. Dr. Man had moved and I kept getting crap about not moving with him. So, I fired up my computer and started writing. Then, I kept writing because there are some seriously hilarious people in my computer.

  38. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:32 pm Gypsy Christy Says:

    I started my blog because after college I was 8 hours away from my family for a short term position in Washington D.C. My blog was a way to keep them updated on my life. As I’m getting ready to move 20 hours away from my family to Texas to work for 4 months, I’m moving my blog dedicated to D.C. to one just about what is going on in my life.

    But I also blog because it keeps me sane. Maybe one day I’ll have other readers besides my friends and family. It would be pretty sweet if I did. But blogging just releases stress and as I have a communication degree but have horrible spelling and grammar, I’m never going to make it as a journalist etc. But my blog can be imperfect just like me.

    Though I call my self a gypsy, I’m not ready to buy any children. Its just what I am because I’m totally not ready to put down roots.

  39. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:39 pm carolyn (team boo) Says:

    i am bogging in an attempt to phase real human interaction out of my life all together. I think with this pregnancy i am almost there…:)

    oh also, its a creative outlet. And it just so happens we meet some amazing people along the way. If we are lucky, we can win some free crap and have people stroke our wounded mommy egos. its a win win.

    Feeling a little shy that you stopped by, but reassured that this isn’t unrequited blog love…my atrophying heart thanks you. your blog is endless entertainment and inspiration, for a girl who’s butt is basically fusing into the fibers of her bed…me.

  40. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:40 pm Dora Says:

    Glad Alex is on the mend.

    Community. HELL, YES!!! I really don’t think I would be pregnant right now if not for my blog and the blogging community. Nuff said.

  41. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:40 pm Mommy Wants Vodka ร‚ยป Blog Archive ร‚ยป Like Rock of Love (sadly … Says:

    […] Mommy Wants Vodka ร‚ยป Blog Archive ร‚ยป Like Rock of Love (sadly … Tags: 2009-at-1046-am, archives, book, children, facebook, house, houses, kids, life, link-a-licious, mommy-wants-vodka, on-july-28th, people, writer […]

  42. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:40 pm Tina Says:

    I think I need to go thru Aunt Becky’s commenters and add all of y’all to my reader thingy. Maybe I can do that tonight since I am being let out of the house without the kids.

    If you are wandering over to my blog, it’s a mess. I need to work on it but my oldest just turned 2 and I have spent the last 2 weeks trying to get my arse in gear for that, all while juzilla naps on me.

    I have tried blogging anonymously and publicly. Public works best. Just can’t say everything I want. But I’ll survive ๐Ÿ˜‰

  43. On July 28th, 2009 at 12:50 pm lady lemon Says:

    I don’t know exactly why I blog, but it is certainly at least in part for a sense of camaraderie.

    I don’t know why you blog, but I am so glad you do.

    Even though I know you are only less than a month older than me, I think that you are what I want to be when I grow up.

    I mean that.

  44. On July 28th, 2009 at 1:56 pm IB Says:

    I started blogging because I like to write and because my friends and family won’t listen to me anymore. Now, I do it for those same reasons but also because I’ve got some friends out there now. It’s fun.

  45. On July 28th, 2009 at 1:03 pm stacey@Havoc&Mayhem Says:

    My blog is a journal. I started in April 04, about 3 weeks after I had my gall bladder out, during which I caught a virulent case of bronchitis that would cling to me until November. That was 6 weeks after DS2 was born, only 15 months after DS1 was born. I was sick and I was so very tired and people would ask me about the baby and I couldn’t remember if he had smiled yet or if DS1 was or even why I was standing in the kitchen with a box of framing nails right this moment. I had to write it down so I could remember it later. It was also a way to connect with others that my illness & exhaustion & insomnia didn’t interfere with. Most of my social life is online since I became a SaHM.

    I make no money off my blog, no PR people court me & I am not assertive enough to go courting them. I have no reason to do so anyway. Blogging falls under beloved hobbies for me, along with crochet & digi scrapping. They are things I love doing, that I cannot imagine not doing, but would probably hate if I suddenly HAD to do them. Things that are *mine* in a life that is mostly entirely shared with 3 others.

  46. On July 28th, 2009 at 1:06 pm daisybv2 Says:

    Hey glad to see Alex is feeling better he looks much better, I blog because my therapist said I should and I too enjoy going back and reading past blogs I have blogged for a long time, but it secret….

    I love your blog and if you ever did write a book no matter what it was about I would be the first to buy it

  47. On July 28th, 2009 at 1:20 pm Ron Says:

    I blog in an attempt to hold onto a tiny shred of my sanity. I share parts of my life that I don’t in real life because I don’t have anyone to share it with.

  48. On July 28th, 2009 at 1:33 pm Sunny Says:

    So… I guess that makes you a Wrogger?

    I started my first blog so that I could share my life with friends and family back home, as DH and I packed up and headed west. There’s gold in them thare hills! It keeps us connected. And honestly… I think many of them know the real “me” better now through my blog than they did when I lived nearby.

    I started my second blog (infertility topic) because I needed the support. I was giving support via comments to others, and I wanted to open up more about my own struggles to get it in return. And my first blog didn’t really seem the place for it.

  49. On July 28th, 2009 at 1:35 pm Ginger Magnolia Says:

    First, I love Alex’s shirt. Rock on.

    Second, I started blogging because I needed to work through everything that was going on in my life after my divorce. Now, it’s my journal. I sort out my thoughts there, and when I don’t write, I feel- like you said-out of sorts. Sometimes I just write about whatever it is I did that day, but it still feels good to get it out there. I also like that I can go back on to see what happened at different times over the past year and a half.

    Third, I love it that I’ve made so many bloggy buddies and that I can peek in on their lives, too.

  50. On July 28th, 2009 at 1:39 pm Mel Says:

    I just started bloggin & haven’t been able to devote much time to it but the few moments I have, it has given me a great feeling of purpose, of existence. You are right, when you go from working in a traditional enviornment to working at home taking care of the house, the kids, the dog, the cats, & all that fun stuff a big part of your identity is lost despite gaining a whole new identity of Mommy. Accomplishing something for yourself takes a backseat to everyone else so blogging is something that is Mine, all mine & I don’t have to feel an ounce of guilt about it.
    It is my own connection with the outside world & a way of letting all those “oh no she didn’t” thoughts out of my head without the “oh no she didn’t” stares.

  51. On July 28th, 2009 at 1:43 pm C @ Kid Things Says:

    I’ve started and stopped more blogs than I can count through the years. Obviously, I keep coming back. Because I like to. Because I need to. Because I want to. And when I stop wanting to, I’ll probably pack my crap and go home. Again. Until next time.

  52. On July 28th, 2009 at 3:02 pm SciFi Dad Says:

    I blog so the people inside my computer keep thinking I’m special.

  53. On July 28th, 2009 at 2:05 pm Christina Says:

    Only the cool kids eat markers…and only the cool moms let the cool kids draw on their arms. It’s called fostering their creative energy. We’re basically raising geniuses.

  54. On July 28th, 2009 at 2:36 pm Lana Says:

    i envy the fact that you ‘need’ to write. i only ‘like’ to write, which often leaves me a week or longer without posting. but i am much happier about what comes out this way as opposed to forcing myself to write something.

  55. On July 28th, 2009 at 2:40 pm Vinomom Says:

    So funny that I somehow linked myself to some religious site. Why would a religious site have an address of ? I’ll have to do more research on that.

    anyways, thanks for letting me know!

  56. On July 28th, 2009 at 3:03 pm Margaret Says:

    I started blogging so I could share my 2 passions….kids and cooking. And to force myself to take more pictures. And to add another thing on my list of: excuses to sit on my ass during nap time.

    I think of writers wearing snazzy jackets with elbow patches and messy hair. With a notebook with random papers spiking out all over. And sometimes they have a pipe b/c elbow patched jackets ought to have a pipe pocket somewhere.

  57. On July 28th, 2009 at 4:05 pm Ms. V Says:

    I started to blog because I was teaching students how to write. I was teaching PE, and also thought it would be a good place to put down the workouts.

    Then I started running. Teaching and running.

    I started reading running blogs. Then marathoners blogs…and finally saw that I could contribute something to this mix and write about a soon-to-be-50 mom starting to run.

    Then I lost my job. ANd the blog became about the job. Losing the marriage, the house, it all started to bleed in together.

    And, now I blog because I like what I read when I write. It’s like I give myself a little wink, because while I might not be the best mommy, or employee, or Christian, or lover…I still have thoughts and feelings that are worthy and worthwhile.

    So …I continue. Great topic.

  58. On July 28th, 2009 at 3:05 pm Amy Says:

    I blog because I want to remember what I was thinking in the past. I think it is important to remember the silly things that were going on. : )

    I’m also obsessing about science fiction, and talking about books that I’m reading.

  59. On July 28th, 2009 at 3:09 pm baseballmom Says:

    I blog because I wanna be like you, girl. Seriously. I blog also because I need a place to vent, and to share the craziness that is my life. Being the Lone Vagina in this house, I have to tell someone my thoughts, and blogging is a great way to do that, especially when I don’t have to tuck my blog under my mattress!
    ps-Alex’s shirt ROCKS!!!

  60. On July 28th, 2009 at 3:10 pm Inna Says:

    I’m not sure why I suddenly decided to start a blog with my closest friend Tanna. I just decided one day that it would be a good idea and she agreed.
    I have enjoyed every minute though, from meeting new people, to actually getting email response back from other people (thanks Becky!) and to reading about people’s daily lives. I think I’ve become kind of obsessed, but its ok because I love it! Its also helped me realize that there is somewhere else I can “be” when I’m not in the lab doing experiments and sometimes wanting to rip my hair out.

  61. On July 28th, 2009 at 4:13 pm lola Says:

    Not sure why I do it, because I’m a busy bitch, but I tried it on a whim, liked it, and then you came into my world offering to feel me up and make out with me. Who wouldn’t keep at it with offers like that pouring in?

  62. On July 28th, 2009 at 3:13 pm Sarcastic Bastard Says:

    I blog because life is hard and oftentimes sad, and I like to make people laugh. I liked your post.

    Sending love,


  63. On July 28th, 2009 at 3:14 pm Birdpress Says:

    How do you get paid to blog? You only have like one ad on here.

    I have a blog mostly for a “home base” I guess, since I am much more of a blog reader and commenter than an actual blogger.

    I don’t particularly like people so much, but I am interested in them. People fascinate me, as long as I can keep them at arm’s length. I like reading blogs because I get to learn people’s thoughts and read about their lives, without having to actually hang out with them. Blog reading is ideal for reclusive social-phobes.

  64. On July 28th, 2009 at 3:33 pm Heather @ Mama Sass Says:

    Being laid off in February did a number on me mentally, and when I lost my job, I also lost health insurance. So, meds and therapy weren’t on the agenda.
    Enter blogging. I’d been doing it half-assedly (oh yeah, that’s a word) for about six months, but now, it’s pretty much a daily thing.
    Which sadly, is more regular than bathing.
    I know it will probably never amount to anything, which is fine and good, because I enjoy running off at the mouth with little consequence. I just hope someone finds me entertaining, some of the time. That’s all.

  65. On July 28th, 2009 at 3:36 pm Swirl Girl Says:

    I blog ‘cuz crack kills.

  66. On July 28th, 2009 at 3:43 pm RhoRho Says:

    Me too me too me too…on the blogging (altho i tried to stop for sake of hurt ego due to few readers), and on the drink. Altho I must wait until 7:30 – after my therapy session. Sigh.

  67. On July 28th, 2009 at 4:00 pm Betty M Says:

    I blog sporadically because I comment a lot and felt that it was a bit weird to comment and not to reveal anything else about myself.
    I have now got 15 of your posts stored up wfor when I have time to read them properly so I’d appreciate you taking a day off! Apologies for commenting way late on these when I get to them.

  68. On July 28th, 2009 at 4:21 pm Mwa Says:

    I do it for exactly that reason, too. I would like me some of what you got. ๐Ÿ™‚ Mommy at home, addicted to reading blogs, thinking “I could do that” and feeling like I could be friends with some of these people who didn’t know I existed.

    I’ve only been blogging for a little while, but already it’s made a huge difference in my life. I’m hoping it’s going to get even better.

  69. On July 28th, 2009 at 4:28 pm Lisa Says:

    Hooray, Alex looks SO much better! Yippee!

    I am SO GLAD you blog, because it is hilarious! Besides lots of comments here I am sure that you also get lots of e-mails and follow other blogs as well. How do you balance all that people demand of you?? ๐Ÿ™‚

  70. On July 28th, 2009 at 4:50 pm Lori in Denver Says:

    So many of your reasons are also my reasons. My advent of blogging was accompanied by the celestial heavens opening up and the choir of angels singing, “aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!” in perfect harmony and clickage.

    And I love the image you putting something down daily, seeing your life as a series of observations to write about, and the pressure that builds until you press Publish. I don’t to daily, but the rest I get.

    Yay for Alex. Except for the crabbiness.

  71. On July 28th, 2009 at 6:20 pm Merritt Says:

    Dude, I hate it when you write my posts before I do! I’ve been meaning to do (almost) this same thing all weekend, I’m just too lazy.

    Anyway, for me, I have all these random thoughts swirling around in my head, and I need an outlet. I used to take Prozac, but as it turns out, blogging is cheaper.

  72. On July 28th, 2009 at 7:25 pm Jess Says:

    I love this comment thread!

    I just started a new blog, and my reasons are a lot like yours. I became a SAHM this year, and felt like I was losing my identity. I want something that is mine. So I am starting all over, and I feel great about it. I am apparently really behind the rest of you, but that’s ok! BlogHer 2018! I’ll be there!

  73. On July 28th, 2009 at 7:07 pm Daniel Says:

    because there aren’t enough people around me to bitch too

  74. On July 28th, 2009 at 7:12 pm Amanda Says:

    Why do I blog?
    I thought that there would be an easy answer but turns out it required more brain power than I originally thought.

    The short of it: I blog because its something that I’ve always wanted to do (which would around the time that Jennifer Weiner/Finslippy and of course, Dooce) started – I just never thought that I had much to say. Turns out that, when I started apparently I don’t know when or how to shut up.

    The other reason? Its hard for me to make friends (hard to believe – I know – since I’m so freaking outgoing and all) and the feedback that I get on my blog makes me feel, well, happy.

    And I KNOW unhappy so I’m just gonna leave it with that.

  75. On July 28th, 2009 at 7:42 pm Eva Says:

    I keep reading posts about how bloggers are all doing reviews and commercial stuff now. I don’t read a single blog like this, so find it confusing.

  76. On July 28th, 2009 at 7:48 pm Jules Says:

    Originally, to have a single spot where family/friend could see pics of the girls instead of sendings lots of annoying emails.

    Turned into a place to vent / get stuff out and find people in similar situations so I don’t think I’m completely off my rocker.
    And since we don’t get out much now it’s more entertaining than doing chores or anything useful.

  77. On July 28th, 2009 at 7:48 pm Danielle Says:

    I always have a hard time talking about my blog and my “bloggy friends”. Nobody gets it unless they, too, blog. They look at me like I have NO friends and I can’t explain the reason with enough emotion as to why I blog. i can’t explain to them the connections I’ve made through blogging. The need to think about someone, whom I’ve never met, because they’re having a SHITTY day. I can’t explain how excited I get for a bloggy friend who just got the best news ever! If the person asking the questions doesn’t blog, he/she will not get it. So, I don’t even try to explain.

    I started blogging to get things out of my head. I don’t care to journal, even though that’s what I’m doing, in a sense. I ended up making real connections to people who could rally around me when I was having those “I just want me mommy ” moments. I have honest to God friends that I’ve met through blogging. All becuase I wrote something hit the publish button and the read it AND commented or emailed. It’s surreal sometimes. That isn’t what I expected to get from blogging, but that is why I continue to blog.

  78. On July 28th, 2009 at 9:07 pm Valerie Says:

    your comments have gone through the roof since blogher!

    anyway, i blog because i like to set each day out once it is done, and see it from the new angle… not necessarily summarize it or try and learn from it, just to mark that it occurred and it was pretty good, pretty bad, or just was.

  79. On July 28th, 2009 at 8:07 pm Lauren Says:

    Hey, I’m 18 and I read your blog. And I find it completely hilarious. ๐Ÿ™‚ Your kids are darling. On the subject at hand, I don’t blog, but I feel that I should. What if all of my random thoughts and ideas and daily musings just stay in my head? It won’t be devastating to anyone, but it’s like being able to go back in a diary and read what you wrote when you were 15. Call it nostalgia…call it self-reflection…whatever. Blogging is fun…well, it would be, if I could ever get around to it…

  80. On July 28th, 2009 at 9:09 pm Tatiana Says:

    I like that you say you blog “for the community”. When I started, I didn’t even think about the community, but it’s become one of the most pressing reasons that I continue to blog. I genuinely care about the people I’ve met online, I genuinely adore seeing their children, and when they’re hurting, I genuinely want to wrap my arms around them and share a bottle of wine.

    I admit, though, that “in real life” I have a hard time even mentioning that I blog. My husband seems to think it’s a more noble profession than I do, since he tells EVERYONE.

  81. On July 28th, 2009 at 8:50 pm mumma boo Says:

    Wow! Alex looks so much better! Rock on, little dude! And I just may have to nom, nom, nom on Amelia’s legs when I’m done slobbering on her cheeks.

    I write because I need to get it out. And thankfully, I’ve found a great group of people out there who “get” me and keep coming back for what I’m dishing out. I’ve met some of the most awesome people through blogging. They keep me going when I need it most. Thanks, Becky, for being one of them.

  82. On July 28th, 2009 at 9:51 pm Lesley Says:

    I started blogging back in 2006 as a way to keep my long distance family connected with the upcoming birth of their first grandchild. It morphed into a photo blog of my son and I stopped writing because I hated the family commentary on anything remotely negative.

    I have two other blogs…one is a remodeling blog & I wanted to connect with other people remodeling 1950’s houses like me. BTW, that has been fabulous. I have “met” so many cool people in the process & have gotten really great information for our remodel.

    I started my recent blog when I realized that too much stuff was in my head. I had to go “underground” and change my twitter ID when my mom found me. I just wanted a place in the world to talk & get the silliness out of my head.
    Of course, I am having so much fun reading blogs that my own blog posts seem so blah! But, oh well, I’m having fun anyway!

  83. On July 28th, 2009 at 8:51 pm giggleblue Says:

    i blog because i like to have a running record of the highs and the lows.

  84. On July 28th, 2009 at 9:09 pm Painted Maypole Says:

    community. yup, that’s it.

  85. On July 28th, 2009 at 9:33 pm Mia Says:

    I discovered your blog after you won your award… I love it! I work for soul-sucking-corporate-america and need to do anything I can to get a laugh squeezed in here or there. I don’t have or want kids, but I’d like to think if I did I would act like you – they’re not delicate little snowflakes, sometimes they’re uber-annoying, and a good cocktail is all a girl needs to take the edge off. So thanks for blogging – you brought a laugh to a 30-year-old-no-kid-havin’-cape-cod-drinkin’-corporate-whore!

  86. On July 28th, 2009 at 10:09 pm Christine Says:

    Why do I blog? Really? Cause I can’t not write and instead of filling notebook after notebook, and stuffing them in a drawer, I found blogging to be cathartic and just public enough, and I fell in love with it. I don’t make any money to speak of, but someday I hope to be famous, or publish a book, or star in a Broadway musical, or something. And I totally forgot my point, but I’m glad that Alex feels better.

  87. On July 28th, 2009 at 11:06 pm Kate Says:

    I blog because I want to feel like someone cares about what happens in my life besides me.

    I have no contact with my family (by choice) and most of my IRL friends live anywhere but near me (perhaps that’s why they’re my friends? LOL), so blogging allows me to connect with people.

    I love to connect with people.


    I’m glad your son is feeling better and I agree with your tactic of screwing the whole “wait and see” philosophy. When you know what’s up and what is needed to fix it, there’s no reason to wait and prolong your child’s misery. Good for you for ignoring your doc and doing what you knew you had to do.

  88. On July 29th, 2009 at 1:10 am Seasin Says:

    My boyfriend claims I blog because no one would listen to my rants in real life. Which might-or might not-be true.
    I also blog because I moved to the country I currently live in (Bulgaria) a year ago and I was struck by how little information there was available on the Net, about the country and the city of Sofia, for people who are not speaking/reading Bulgarian (and the cyrilic alphabet). Things like finding a restaurant, or a hairdresser, or a dentist, or how much a monthly subscription to the Metro in Sofia costs, were nearly impossible. So I started (stress is on “started”-my blog isn’t a month old yet) to blog about those things for other expats living here-or considering it. And for Bulgarians who have enough English and enough of a sense of humor to see their country and their customs through foreign eyes. And so that I can rant, naturally ๐Ÿ™‚
    So that’s why i blog. And of course, because I love writing.
    Can I add your blog as a link in mine? Like everyone else, I think I love you. And I’m not that easy normally, you know?

  89. On July 29th, 2009 at 5:14 am Kelley Says:

    I don’t blog…yet. I’m thinking I should probably start because it’s cheaper than therapy.
    What has stopped me so far is the dread of the ridicule I am likely to get from himself and my teenagers, and also the fact that I’m not convinced that I have anything to say.

    Then again, if I said it all in a blog, maybe I wouldn’t ramble on so much in real life!

  90. On July 29th, 2009 at 6:30 am Rayne of Terror Says:

    I started blogging and blog reading as a lifeline when I was home with Henry in a new town with no friends and no money. Now that I work full time the urge to write is (clearly) lessened. I fully expect when I’m home again with Quinn and Henry this fall and winter, I’ll pick it back up. I went to blogher was for inspiration, not stuff. I came home with a measure of each. I was very glad to meet you and hope we can make plans to get together outside the craziness of the conference.

  91. On July 29th, 2009 at 8:43 am Halala Mama Says:

    A lovely post – even though the title led me to believe I would be reading an ode to trannies and how they are missed in main stream vh1 programming. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    I don’t know what I would say if someone asked me. I would probably just introduce them to my husband, who thinks speaking to anyone is way overrated, and then they would know: I will go crazy if I don’t talk to SOMEONE.

  92. On July 29th, 2009 at 8:44 am Halala Mama Says:

    Oh, and Facebook is SOOO a verb.

  93. On July 29th, 2009 at 7:47 am Kate Says:

    At first it was therapy, but now I feel like i’m a part of a community. Some people say that they want their kids to read what they’ve written, but I woudl never want my kids to see how crazy I really am!

  94. On July 29th, 2009 at 8:51 am Anna Says:

    I started blogging as a way to keep the family and friends updating on our doings. Not long after, I started looking forward to things in a total ‘Oh wow, I’m so blogging about that tonight’ way.

    My dream would be to let it ALL out there but I’m your typical midwestern white chick that is toooo obsessive about others’ thoughts and feelings to actually do it.

    And, I really want to say SHIT in mine more.

  95. On July 29th, 2009 at 9:35 am Apple Sauce Says:

    “I don’t own a fisherman’s sweater anymore”

    That line cracked me up. I literally LOLed.

    As of now, my husband is the only person IRL who knows I have a blog, and he doesn’t even know the URL. My blog gives me freedom. I can tell the whole internet that I forgot to be the tooth fairy again, yet still show my face at the PTA meetings. I am free to write the truth about myself, and I know that anyone who virtually likes me really likes ME.

  96. On July 29th, 2009 at 9:39 am Kendra Says:

    Wow, looks like you asked a question that hit a nerve with a lot of people!

    Your kids are gorgeous, and I’m so, so glad that Alex is better. My daughter is seriously into the eating markers and drawing on everything, so long as that thing is not an approved piece of paper.

    I’ve only been blogging for a few months, and no one in my real life knows I have a blog. I think that when I spend all day with my kids and then my husband, then I go to bed and deal with whichever one of them insists that they need something at 2 AM, I start to feel like I am nothing but a response to other people’s needs. But when I take a moment to write down what’s happened or how I feel about it or just tell a funny story, I feel like this person inside my head still exists. I used to be known as “the smart one” in my family. Now I’m “the one with all the kids.” At first, I was just trying to write things down the same way I would in a diary, just for my own sanity. Then I got a few comments, and I realized that there were other people who thought my stories were at least worth reading. And what was originally just a kind of purging turned into a way to feel connected to people–people who don’t share a bathroom with me, and that’s so valuable.

    I’ve often heard writers and artists talk about how they “have” to create, to get it all out. And I’ve taken that to mean that I am clearly not of that class, since I have no creative urge so intense that to stifle it is to die. But I guess in a sense, I do it because I have to–because it connects me to other thinking, feeling creatures, and without that, I would certainly die.

  97. On July 29th, 2009 at 12:16 pm amber Says:

    I started blogging for two reasons; to get the crazies out of my head and to force myself to write for fun, not cash money. Now I do it because, well, I guess I like to hear myself talk. And I find myself on the fringes of this wonderful community that I so, so want to be a part of. And because it’s become part of who I am. And because…see I told you I like to hear myself talk!

  98. On July 29th, 2009 at 2:59 pm Katie Says:

    Glad Alex is doing better!

    It’s totally about the community for me. I was lucky in that my first blog was all infertility and the Stirrup Queens put me on their list and suddenly, I had all these people with similar issues to commiserate with. It started out as a way to keep friends and family informed of what was going on with our IVF, etc., but turned into a whole other community thing.

    But no matter what, you ARE a writer, Aunt Becky. A damned good one, too.

  99. On July 29th, 2009 at 6:07 pm sharon Says:

    totally agree – it’s all about the community!!!

    soooooo glad Alex is feeling better too!

  100. On July 29th, 2009 at 9:19 pm magpie Says:

    i blog because i like the outlet. i need the outlet. i like the community. and it’s fun.

  101. On July 30th, 2009 at 9:51 am Conventions of Blog « Blog In Review Says:

    […] My favorite posts have to be Pioneer Woman (I love her!)and Mommy Wants Vodka . […]

  102. On July 30th, 2009 at 8:54 am Jenn Says:

    I’m glad Alex is feeling better. I started blogging before I had kids but then it was a half-hearted thing. More like a crappy daylog or bitchfest. NOW I do it for the same reason you do (when I get the chance!!) – because I need people to relate to. Being a SAHM is haaaaaaaaaaard when you have no one to commiserate with you. ๐Ÿ™‚

  103. On July 30th, 2009 at 4:36 pm Sandy Says:

    You ARE a writer, and a damn good one (see “About Me” for my credentials, lol). I started blogging to make my mom happy, but now I do it for the fame and fortune, lol.

  104. On July 31st, 2009 at 2:13 am bethany Says:

    maybe you are the duchiness that is jophn mayers mayonaise. heeeeeeeyy. ever think of that shit. you know. oh, heeeeeeeeeeeeeeey. i lov mayo and a good dad. and a good rub, as well as this and tat. tyou knoooooooow drunkls are cool too DUH. yo know. heeeey. and thyis and that and this somemopre. i lobe chi town,. i know you from when you ad ben. yuupo noow me. no. pron no t you are a mom now. and tats copp; co you. you ar funny. and shit. ytou are yoi i laight. hahah. like that, you kbow no haeeeey. wedding! you are funnyt. funniest blog ya rigjyt!!!!!! be!n! alex! amielia arifhaeart! aheand shit. DUH

  105. On July 31st, 2009 at 2:14 am bethany Says:


  106. On July 31st, 2009 at 2:15 am bethany Says:

    hhahahahaha i loe you and your face bogher was so fung you jearddddd

  107. On August 4th, 2009 at 10:10 am Heather Says:

    I have asked myself this question a lot in the last two days. Good to hear someone else’s answer as well as my own. ๐Ÿ™‚

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