Mommy Wants Vodka

…Or A Mail-Order Bride

Let’s Have a Playdate in Court!


My friend Marinka went on vacation this week because she is a lazy slacker, so she asked me to fill in for her at The Mouthy Housewives. I’m all giving advice and shit (although this isn’t the Ask Aunt Becky column that I’ll be setting up)(it’s not ready yet)(because, obviously).

Below you, or click this link in your reader, you can see all the sweet ass places my business cards have been. Deadline for entries is September 8th, y’all.

Also, because I am trying to be more like Marinka in my laziness–especially if it gets me a vacation (bwahahahaha! Yeah RIGHT) what should I post about?

I’ll be back tomorrow with either a love letter to one of my television husbands or Aunt Becky as the Pioneer Woman.

19 Comments to

“Let’s Have a Playdate in Court!”

  1. On August 25th, 2009 at 6:46 am Kitty Murray Says:

    Aunt Becky as Pioneer Woman!

    I wonder if I’ll get beaten by her masses when I post this. Because I am NOT EVEN CLOSE TO the Pioneer Woman.

  2. On August 25th, 2009 at 9:32 am Becca Says:

    Ooooh! I pick Aunt Becky as Pioneer Woman. I wonder if you could get hate mail just for mentioning her??? Hehehehe!

  3. On August 25th, 2009 at 9:49 am kimberella Says:

    I agree MWV as Pioneer Woman would be extremely entertaining.

  4. On August 25th, 2009 at 10:27 am Mrs Soup Says:

    Ooooo yes! Aunt Becky as Pioneer Woman! Brilliant and totally entertaining.

  5. On August 25th, 2009 at 10:31 am Kris Says:

    I’m clicking here from Julie’s site, just to say one thing. Thank you for admitting you spank. I always feel I’m the only one.

  6. On August 25th, 2009 at 10:33 am Coco Says:

    I’m going to swim against the tide here and say I want a “Dear Television Husband Letter”.

    Because you are so awesome you don’t need to be anyone but my darling Aunt Becky.

  7. On August 25th, 2009 at 11:31 am Joan Says:

    I think you should write a “Dear ______” letter reminiscent of Alanis Morissette’s “Unsent” song. In case you are unfamiliar, she pens little messages to her exes. I’ve thought of doing this myself.

  8. On August 25th, 2009 at 11:44 am DG at Diaryofamadbathroom Says:

    Aunt Becky,

    I so wanted to comment on the high quality, nay, SAGE advice you gave over at the Mouthy Housewives. But they have some “rule” or “filter” that prevents people behind firewalls from posting comments. WTF? Stealth readers, by virtue of our complete lack of dedication to the job, make the BEST readers. What are they, in cahoots with my employer? Can I say cahoots again just for the sheer joy of it? Cahoots! Cahoots! Cahoots! Aaaaahhhhh. Anyway, it is far more entertaining to think of pithy comments in response to the (much appreciated) read of a post than it is to do so at home. Reading and commenting at work gives us the added benefit of trying to stifle a giggle and end up shooting bottled water out our noses. Oh the mirth and merriment! DENIED!

  9. On August 25th, 2009 at 11:44 am mumma boo Says:

    Oh, yes, a Dear TV Hubby letter, please! I’d like to see Aunt Becky teach those TV louses a thing or two. *wink*

  10. On August 25th, 2009 at 2:07 pm Sarah Says:

    What Tracy said – I want them BOTH, Lady, and don’t give me any guff about it!

    Plus, you give awesome advice. I’m so writing up a disclaimer for all who come to my house. Right now.

    What do I have to do to get a picture of you in an old school (is there another kind?!) sunbonnet with the Pioneer Woman post?

    I think I’d need a sunbonnet first. THEN, I would totally do it.

  11. On August 25th, 2009 at 2:11 pm heather Says:

    Seriously. Did you learn NOTHING from that Vincent D’Onofrio debacle?

    I STILL get people who come over and chew me a new one for that post! Bwahahahaha!

  12. On August 25th, 2009 at 1:36 pm Tracy Says:

    🙂 I’m confident…my dearest Aunt Becky stalkers….that sooner or later…we’ll see both of these posts. Can’t decide which I’m more looking forward too!

    *rubs hands together* Oh, they will be rad. BOTH of them. But, of course, not the same post. That would be weird.

  13. On August 25th, 2009 at 2:07 pm Rebecca Says:

    Love letter. I love love letters!

    I believe once you sort of said you might post the story about how you met The Davers. Though I’d rather see this post on YOUR blog, not someone elses blog.

    Topics to write on her blog….How the definition of housewife has changed over the past 100 years. Sort of do a 1920’s housewife did this…..1930’s,…..1940…….(your thoughts on each year about how it was a bunch of crap the mom wore a dress and pearls to vacuum!) Each decade could be a new blog!

    Also…..I.Want.Business.Cards! Who cares about winning the stinking contest. I just want to enter the contest. I want to show Aunt Becky a good time!

  14. On August 25th, 2009 at 5:14 pm Badass Geek Says:

    It’s Hugh Laurie, isn’t it?

    No. It’s Glenn Beck. Gotta be Glenn Beck.

    Wait, who the hell is Glenn Beck?

  15. On August 25th, 2009 at 6:18 pm Amy Says:

    Dear Aunt Becky,
    I never got your business cards.. *sadness*

    ACK! I mailed them! ACK! Shoot me an email if you can. I’ll see if I can send you some more.

  16. On August 25th, 2009 at 7:46 pm Inna Says:

    why do we have to chose between these posts, Aunt Becky? Can’t you provide us with both? A pioneer woman who tackles her TV husband?

    Why have OR when you can have AND, right?

  17. On August 26th, 2009 at 7:24 am Katy Says:

    You’re gonna give us a recipe, right? With lots and lots of meat and butter and cheese?

  18. On August 26th, 2009 at 7:26 am Katy Says:

    My favorite is Meat, Meat, Meat!

  19. On August 26th, 2009 at 10:25 am Kelly Says:

    Aunt Becky, I love you AND Pioneer Woman. I read both of your blogs, so have at it! Go for it! Don’t hold back! 🙂

    Do you think she’s going to hate me and send her people to kill me?

Email will not be published

Website example

Your Comment:

My site was nominated for Best Humor Blog!
My site was nominated for Hottest Mommy Blogger!
Back By Popular Demand...