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An Open Letter To Nintendo

February9

Dear Nintendo,

I was not a Nintendo Kid. I was not a part of the Nintendo generation. I mean, technically, I should’ve been – the NES came out when I was at the absolute right age to be enchanted by your two tiny Italian plumbers, trying to save the princess from um, someone mean.

I’d have known the NAME of this “mean person” except that my parents were all “video games are stupid! They rot your brain!”

Apparently, Nintendo, that only applied to the NES games. My brother happily played his Zork games on the computer. And the following Christmas, just as Super Mario 3 came out, I was given a Sega Genesis.

For a couple of months, I happily plugged away at my Sonic The Hedgehog game, always wondering why a wee blue hedgehog cared about getting rings or beating some evil genius villain. About the time I got Kris-Kross “Make My Video,” I realized I was the only fucking kid on the block with a Sega Genesis. Everyone else had, you guessed it, a Nintendo. Or a Super Nintendo. Or a Super Nintendo hold the lettuce sub mayo.

Sure, my system had better graphics, but Mario could wear a raccoon suit! HOW COOL WAS THAT?

Answer: ludicrous.

Eventually, I ditched video games forever. I’m no gamer girl.

When I had kids, I expected they’d be like me – they’d prefer to read books (with pages!) rather than waste their time moving badly animated characters around the screen.

Nintendo, I was wrong. I was so, so wrong.

We got a Wii for Dave (under the pretense of being for Ben) after we moved into our house. Well played on that one, Nintendo. The Wii was used for awhile until, well, it wasn’t.

Then the kids switched to a Game Boy or DS or whatever the hell the hand-held video thingamabob was. Soon, I had not one, but two sons obsessing over beating level four or five-niner or whatever. I bit my tongue – I remembered being the only kid on the block unable to talk about how “cool” the “Mario raccoon suit” was. I remembered, Nintendo, feeling saddened that no one wanted to see my Kris-Kross “I Missed The Bus” video.

A couple of weeks ago, Nintendo, my eldest saved up all his cash to buy a new Wii. See, Nintendo, our old Wii had stopped working months before. I was not saddened, but my children, well, my children were prostrate (not prostate!) with grief.

And now, now Nintendo, we have a Wii. We have two Game Boys. We have Mario candy and Yoshi figurines. We have two boys who want a “Mario” themed bedroom. We have a mother who is banging her head against the wall, still saddened that no one wants to see her Kris-Kross video.

Nintendo, you are a crafty bitch.

So for now, you win, Nintendo.

I know Sega will make a comeback any day now. And when they do, the whole WORLD can see my mad video making skillz.

Love,

Aunt Becky

27 Comments to

“An Open Letter To Nintendo”

  1. On February 9th, 2012 at 10:57 am Jenn Says:

    I had a Sega too. I have spent hours explaning Bubsy, and Sonic to my friends. No one cared, because Mario had a raccoon suit. I’ll watch your video. 🙂

  2. On February 9th, 2012 at 10:59 am Brooklyn Says:

    So true! I didn’t go video games as a kid either but my uncle had a Sega and that was all I knew. I too now have a daughter with a ds, except she obsesses over Tinkerbell and getting the right fairy seed or choosing the best outfit for Alex in WoWP. We have a Wii as well but it gets used for Netflix more often than not. I am a reader too and understand nothing of getting to the next level. Great post!

  3. On February 9th, 2012 at 11:11 am Leila (Don't Speak Whinese) Says:

    I uuuh… was born a geeky gamer girl! I grew up on all Nintendo systems because that is what you do in a nerdy Japanese family 😉 but, I never had a sega genesis. I didn’t care about that hedgehog…. however, now I am really envious of your Kirss-kross video!!! I want to see it.

    Kriss Kross is also my favorite song on the wii Just Dance 2 game. Now you know you want that game. C’mon… we can have a wii Just Dance off 😉

  4. On February 9th, 2012 at 11:17 am Ms Dreamer Says:

    Yeah, I didn’t have video games until college. How’s that for loserdom? Husband has a N64, an Xbox, a sega, and a Wii. Next up, PS3 for his b-day in May so he can game it up with the boys. Sigh. I’m a gamer widow. Just wait till I get WoW back…

  5. On February 9th, 2012 at 11:37 am Vinobaby Says:

    I want my atari back. I could kick some major Pitfall ass growing up. Last year we bought the updated wii version. The boys love it. I’m lost. I can wii bowl, but that’s about it.

    And I always used to joke with the Hubby that if I ever wanted to have an affair, I’d start buying him those bloody or scify major games…

  6. On February 9th, 2012 at 11:54 am Mayor Gia Says:

    Hahahh we had a nintendo AND sega. Sega had a cool little mermaid game, i remember…. and Nintendo had sesame street for me as a kid.

  7. On February 9th, 2012 at 11:57 am Kadee Barrett Says:

    Oh, Aunt Becky. I feel your pain. Video games were anathema in my house. I <3 books. But I am now finally learning to <3 games too. I do know how you can make three boys in your house quite happy though… http://www.whatisblik.com/shop/explore?designer=11 Hello Mario bedroom for Ben and Alex! The Daver will probably want one too, but maybe if he's good Ben and Alex will let him visit 😉

  8. On February 10th, 2012 at 1:46 am Devan Says:

    These are COOL! Thanks for sharing it!

  9. On February 9th, 2012 at 12:05 pm nellie vaughn Says:

    His name was Koopa. Later it became Bowser. There was a game for the DS that was released in 2009 that is all about Bowser. It is called Bowser’s Inside Story. Cute, I know. I am sorry I know this. Actually, I am sorry I am not sorry at all. Wait, huh? The point is, I am a gamer. I have turned my very young nieces into gamers, which turned them on to reading. Let me explain. They love a game called BioShock. It’s all they can talk about. Well, BioShock is based on an Ayn Rand novel. When I told my nieces this, they requested I read it for them. Now, they love reading and video games equally.

  10. On February 9th, 2012 at 12:14 pm Jenn Says:

    I’m a little older than you, so my loser videogame console was an Odyssey (instead of an Atari). Coincidentally, it is the same loser console my husband had.

    Never heard of it, right?

    The kiddos have a leapfrog, a Wii, a Kindle Fire, and plenty of computers that play Minecraft and Plants vs. Zombies and make their own games in Scratch. I might even have a Steam account. We’ve made up for it.

    If you are looking for an easy way to Mario decorate, get yourself to your nearest Target immediately! They have these really nice fuzzy Mario blankets, and sheets, and comforters, and even a Mario plushie (but I’m holding out for a Yoshi, of course). I’m adding some other things to their room: painted their walls a sky blue, painted the “?” boxes on their dressers, there is a piranha plant on the side of their bookshelf, and am putting together (hopefully before they move out of the house) a couple of Lakitu cloud wall hangings.

  11. On February 9th, 2012 at 12:34 pm Erin T Says:

    We had an Atari when we were young. When a family friend was selling his original Nintendo and games for $50 so he could buy the next generation of Nintendo products, my father flat out refused to help us pay or to advance us the money because, in his words, we had a “perfectly good Atari”. Never mind they no longer made cartridges for it, one joystick was broken and the other only went forward, and the only game that was usable was Pitfall. Yeah – Perfectly good Atari my A##!!

  12. On February 9th, 2012 at 12:41 pm andy Says:

    But Becky, you can get Sega’s Sonic Blue HedgeHog games for the Wii! Maybe you can still be a gamer after all!

  13. On February 9th, 2012 at 12:53 pm red Says:

    My parents jumped on the band wagon early and got a Nintendo for my bro, but when you started having to buy a whole new system every few years, they wised-up and never purchased another.

    Then I had a friend in college who was actually an artist for Sega. He always has all of every type of video-game system.

    I love that the little hand-held ones are back. Reminds me of Donkey Kong. personally, though, I don’t play any games. Except Angry Birds, of course.

  14. On February 9th, 2012 at 12:58 pm Brett Minor Says:

    I have never owned a Nintendo or Atari anything, but I loved video games. I thought it was cool to have better systems than everyone else had. I had a personal computer before everyone else and had the SEGA GENESIS and a TurboGraphx 16. While it was disappointing that no one knew what games I was talking about, I loved that mine were cooler.

    Today, I have an XBOX 360 like everyone else.

  15. On February 9th, 2012 at 1:01 pm Amanda Says:

    Mario is an epidemic! My seven year old brother has been Mario for the past FOUR Halloweens! AND! had 2 Mario birthday parties where he dressed like him! Good luck!

  16. On February 9th, 2012 at 1:07 pm melanie Says:

    I totally bought the sonic game for the DS for my son, just because like you, I was the ONLY one with the sega LOL…

  17. On February 9th, 2012 at 1:43 pm Becky (Ms Batman) Says:

    Growing up we had the Atari 5200, but once I got married, my husband already had the Nintendo *and* the Sega. But when ZELDA came out, I got the Super NES. We had 3 game consoles.
    A few years ago, my brother got me the Atari Flashback
    http://www.amazon.com/Atari-Flashback-2-Plug-Play/dp/B00093DHIK
    for Christmas and it was just about the most awesome thing ever. River Raid, Centipede, and about 35 other games in one plug-n-play. My kids? Don’t even get it. Sometimes I don’ t even know who they are.

  18. On February 9th, 2012 at 3:20 pm Grace Says:

    My husband bought me as DS. I couldn’t stand it and gave it to my granddaughters. Their mom won’t let them play it either.

  19. On February 9th, 2012 at 3:50 pm Melissa Says:

    I was never into it except for my year long addiction to Super Mario Brothers. It got boring though when I couldnt lose. I could play for hours and hours hoping to WIN, but apparently that is impossible. I played 12 hours straight once. I wanted to break the damn thing.

  20. On February 9th, 2012 at 5:22 pm Cate Says:

    I feel your pain. I had a Sega Game Gear (no console for me!) I can still hear that inane “Segaaaaaa.” But I ruled at Sonic as well as Ecco the Dolphin.

  21. On February 9th, 2012 at 6:33 pm Meg N Says:

    OMG..I soo feel your pain! My parents only let me have Atari. When my oldest stepson got his Sega then Sega Genesis games I was hooked on Sonic and then eventually Doom (DONT ASK!)

    However, I have since learned that you can plug in the old controllers to the white Wii system on the top and if you had the Sega Genesis games (the small Discs) they WILL PLAY IN THE Wii!) Can I get a wut wut !!! Dude, my sweet girl is still able to play the Wii and those games but her brother and I have been able to introduce her to a whole new world of Sonic and old school Sonic…Maybe all hope is not lost…hang in there babe!

  22. On February 9th, 2012 at 9:25 pm Brandon Says:

    HERE’S THE KICKER:

    I have a Wii. But I went to their Wii shop and downloaded a bunch of old school SEGA games for it.

    Do I buy the $60 wii games? No. I have Sonic on it, Fantasy Zone, and all the fun sega games.

    I use Nintendo against itself. Yes, you can go that….

    SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE–GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA….. (you just did it like the Genesis, didn’t you?)

  23. On February 9th, 2012 at 11:22 pm Lorelei Says:

    My parents wouldn’t let me have a gaming system but my brother had two or three of his own given to him or bought by him. I was eternally jealous, sneaking into his room to play the games myself. I never did get my own, and at 23 still haven’t made the splurge, but my time spent on his Nintento and friends consoles have made me a lifelong fan of that particular plumber.

  24. On February 10th, 2012 at 6:18 am Cindy Says:

    I need to see thew Kris Kross video!

  25. On February 10th, 2012 at 9:12 am Grace Says:

    Add me to the list of people who want to see the Kris Kross video.

    My only video game experience as a kid was Pac Man and Frogger. My best friend had the little mini arcade games of them. In high school, my then boyfriend handed me the controller while he went to talk to a friend about something. He was playing The Real Ghostbusters game. I kept trying to kill the bastards, but he had a Game Genie and they wouldn’t die! Dammit. I’m not a gamer. Never will be.

    My daughter has a Nintendo DS and my hubby has an X-Box. I use it to watch Netflix movies.

  26. On February 10th, 2012 at 12:10 pm Marta Says:

    I had neither a Sega nor a Gameboy growing up. But I did play Sims and Myst on my computer! woohoo!

  27. On February 10th, 2012 at 9:49 pm Tricia @SassyPantsMomma Says:

    I feel like you talked it up enough and now you have an obligation to share the Kris Kross video.

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