I Remember
September11
I remember sitting and clutching my squally infant son, born mere weeks before, as I watched the second plane fly into the Twin Towers. I remember holding him and crying myself, wondering how I could have been so awful as to bring a brand new baby into a world where stuff like this happens.
I remember crying for all of the parents and children who died that day, now knowing just how much they had lost. I remember being afraid, so very afraid, of what was going to happen next.
I remember now, and I wonder: what will I tell my son who was there with me that day, the two of us against the world?
What do you remember?
I remember seeing the pictures on a television that I passed on my way to work and thinking it strange that they were showing a movie that day.
I remember not really believing.
I remember all the radio stations being taken over by the news while driving to the hospital where my mother was because they thought that she may have had a stroke.
I remember just being in a state of Shock.
Wanting desperately to get my hands on all my kids and my husband. Right that second.
Knowing that this was going to lead to a world of shit. A WORLD of shit.
Which it has.
Being pregnant with our 4th child and like you wondering, why did I get pregnant, what was the world going to be like for this child?
I remember watching the news all day and feeling tense, worried, afraid, sad, confussed and in a complete state of questioning.
Everything. I remember everything. I experienced every single emotion possible. Fear. Anxiety. Anger (lots of anger). Sadness. Horror. Pity. Gratitude (that my fiance – now husband – was standing next to me and was not far away). Guilt. Pride (in the rescue workers I saw going in after the first hit). Helplessness. I remember it all. Every.single.minute. I will not forget. Ever.
Being 15 miles away from where a plane rammed into the pentagon.
Realizing how beautiful and quiet it was, because we lived under the Dulles flight path and all the planes were grounded.
Frantically calling cousins who worked in the Towers, they all wound up fine — one hiking down 50 flights in tower II, the others were waiting for the elevator to go up when the first plane hit.
Calling other NYers to get their stories.
Wondering how on earth someone could ever be this angry.
I remember having the unbearable need to contact every single person I knew. When they sent us home to be with our families that is exactly what I did.
disbelief and subsequent overwhelming sadness…read my blog today for my thoughts on that tragic day.
I thought about all of the people. Then I thought well, that’s it. I won’t be able to have kids now. We had been trying so hard and I didn’t know if we could/should have children after that. Happy now with 5 1/2 year old twins.
I remember wanting to rush home to my 11 month old that entire day at work and just be near him (didn’t care so much about the husband at the time – we divorced a few months later).
I remember the silence in the air (I live near an airport and no flights = eerie silence).
I remember being afraid to go walking at night alone for months.
I remember feeling sad for the families who were forced (and are still being forced) to relive it over and over again, thanks to the media.
What happened to me that day is what my post is about, too. My day was nuts, because as it was unfolding, I was stuck in traffic in a tunnel in Boston. I was listening to Howard Stern, and it was sooo eery being stuck underground and watching the faces on the people in the cars next to you getting the news. The fear was palpable.
After I finally got home and in the days that followed, my feelings towards my nine-month old were the same as yours. I felt awful for bringing him into this world. I’ve had many moments since where I’ve thought that I never would have had a child had that happened before.
All right, I’ve got to finish my post, now that I’ve overtaken your blog.
I remember not ever wanting to feel ever again as scared and helpless as I did that day.
more than i wish to.
I was cleaning house with the satellite music stations on and didn’t know anything had happened until 2pm. Sadly, I thought it was a chance for G.W. to show what he was really made of. Even sadder, he did.
I remember wishing I could go home from work and wondered how life could possibly continue when something of this magnitude happens. Similar to how I feel when someone close to me dies. I can’t imagine how the world can continue to turn, and yet, strangely, it does.
I felt so terribly isolated, because we lived in Hawaii at the time, and had just moved there. We couldn’t physically see our families, or hold them and know that they were okay. That was very hard. It was truly bizarre to walk outside the house and see all the other military spouses looking at each other, knowing that their husbands would be sent away soon, just blank stares and disbelief.
Same exact situation with me, holding my infant son and sobbing hysterically.
I also remember not believing it for the first ten minutes. I had to call a friend and ask if I wasn’t becoming delusional.
I remember waking up at noon, and my grandma telling me the towers had been hit by planes. I remember thinking, they’ll just give anyone a pilot license. (Thinking it was a Cesna or something)
I remember the feeling of my stomach sinking into my feet when I walked into the living room and saw what was really going on.
I remember going to work, and not wanting to talk to anyone. I felt horrible, because I wasn’t tied to anyone in New York. Like it was bad that I didn’t know what those people were feeling.
I remember so much in pieces. My son was 1 year old, and home with me. my husband works in a major chemical manufacturing plant, I remember calling him and being nearly hysterical when I begged him to come home, he was sitting in the middle of a very large target…I remember my heart pounding out of my chest when he said he would not leave, would not give into the fear that the terrorists were trying to put on us. I remember calling my friend who lives exactly 4 blocks from the towers and nearly throwing up when I heard his voice, finally. I remember calling my sister in upstate NY to see if she understood what was going on..she did not,either. I remember feeling so terrible that all I did for days was break out in tears and I remember praying to God that this would all just stop…I’m glad I remember, but I’m glad my son was too little to have to remember it.
I’m crying, writing, it’s hard to remember, but we have to, for all those who went on before us, we have to.
I remember that I was at my boyfriend’s house, hanging clothes on the line. My daughter was 3 at the time, and she was playing on the swingset. I remember thinking it was some sick hoax at first, then going outside and getting my little girl and making her stay in the house the rest of the day, as if I could keep her safe that way.
How blue the sky was that day. How beautiful. And how mystified we all were at what this meant. I had such a dreadful feeling that it meant so much more heartache and pain and death in the future. And unfortunately, I was right.
The weather was so perfect in Chicago that day. How ironic…I remember how my 3rd child did not understand why I was crying so hard that day…
It was the week my marriage ended.
I was pregnant with my second daughter. My husband was away on business and wasn’t able to get a flight back home until a couple of days later. It was tough, but we survived it.
As someone who grew up in Israel, I believe that the most important thing is to NEVER let terror bring us down. Life must go on. It’s the only way to win this war.
I remember how beautiful it was outside, and being completely unaware of what happened when I walked my son to kindergarten. My husband called me on the phone later that morning, and told me, and I just cried. I was pregnant with Alex, and wondering if he would have a safe world to grow up in, and I just wanted to go get T from school and be with him. So horrific.
I turned on the Today Show to catch the weather before getting dressed for my 9:40 honors seminar class at UT when I saw what was the second plane fly into the towers. I called E at work and held on the line while he told his partner in the next office who’s from Long Island. The coworker went pale and mumbled terrorist attack and pulled a small television into the meeting room for the office to watch. I remember going to class and not wanting to be there while professors tried to distract everyone with literary analysis when there was a new kind of analysis beginning on a much larger scale. I remember a classmate crying because her mother worked in the Pentagon and she couldn’t reach her by phone. Like everyone else, I remember the bluest of blue skies on such a black, black day.
I remember just coming into downtown Chicago for work when the 1st reports came in….they made it sound like a small personal plane…and I thought—ohhh how awful…
5 minutes later I get 10 phone calls on my cell.
“where are you? are you okay?Our country is under attack”
Once they told me the “real” story I had to pull off to the side and gather myself.
My job that day would be challenging….i was in hotel management at the time. Many questions to answer…people to rearrange…employees to calm…and guests to accomodate and find alternate transportation home—where ever that might be.
I was also 20 weeks pregnant at the time—-lost the baby 4 weeks later….
I remember the sinking feeling taking over my body when the 1st tower fell..and then the 2nd.
I remember hiding in my office crying so no one would see me.
I remember…having to push my own fears deep down in order to help the guests in my care.
I didn’t see the videos till I got home later that night…..and I remember the shutter that went through my whole body when I saw the planes hitting the towers and then them falling.
I remember staying up all night wondering how we as a country would recover.
Mel at Stirrup Queens has a site called and she asked for our memories in 100 words.
Here’s .
Sorry, the site is called Bridges. The second link is my 100 words.
I’m a total code blonde today. Please don’t hate me.
I’d just returned home from taking my oldest to kindergarten and my husband, who was watching The Today Show, said, “something weird is happening,” just as the second plane hit. We watched astounded for a few more minutes then he stayed with the younger two while I went to get the oldest from kindergarten. It may seem irrational but I wanted all my chicks in my nest and under my care. My greatest fear that all the militant crazies, (and Arkansas has plenty), would take this as their sign to cut loose.
I’ve been to Ground Zero several times and those images will never leave me. God Bless us all.
It was a horribly shocking tear filled day.
I was at my desk in London. It was after lunch when someone wandered in to say a light aircraft that had crashed into the WTC. We didn’t have tvs so we were refreshing the BBC News pages like crazies. We had clients in the towers some of whom were lost that day. Reaching NYC by phone was impossible so it was a few days before I could check on friends. London emptied early that evening. Even though we were used to the IRA and endless bomb scares so security alerts and even bombs were things we Londoners were pretty blase about something on this scale was incomprehensible. People wanted to be home. I had to go out for a work thing – it was surreal to find that the city was nearly empty at 6 pm.
I remember being terrified of what might happen in the world as a result of that morning, and how I could answer that for the baby I was five months pregnant with on that day. I also remember gathering with strangers that night, and the grief and tears and prayers we all shared in common while we tried to feel connected to something that was “right” and safe at that moment.
i remember every detail of that day from the moment i heard the first plane crash announced….i remember thinking “this isn’t happening”……i remember driving by our airport that day to see all the planes grounded and how strange and surreal that all looked……i remember hoping that once all four plane crashes had occured that was all they had planned!!
I remember the absolute numbness – none of my kids had left for school yet, my husband and I were both still home — and we just stood there, numb, watching it all unfold — and then the sheer terror and panic when I realized my sister had talked to her husband from our office the day before and he was at his office in New York — I couldn’t even dial the phone I was so overwhelmed with fear for her and their kids — they hadn’t heard anything, they were getting a weird message when they tried his cell and also his office — but he was likely across the river in Queens, but she really wasn’t sure. It took until late that night for him to find his way out of the city and upstate toward a possible rental car and also to have the ability to call home — he was fine — but it still took him several days to get home. I also remember actually working in Downtown Denver among the highrises, and eventually after the airspace was closed going in to work — the deathly silence downtown was incredibly eerie.
Crying, and crying, and crying, and crying. And finally walking down the street with my husband-then-boyfriend to get sushi and lots of sake with lots more crying. Thinking, oh my god we’re going to war, and they’ll take you away. And then crying more for being a selfish dweeb. Being afraid. Waiting in line for an hour at the blood bank and then walking away because I started to faint in the stairwell of the blood bus. Crying some more. Watching Jon Stewart. Expecting more to happen. Watching news with my insane roommates on the big screen TV that for once, wasn’t playing Balls Deep every evening.
I was 21 and it was junior year of college.
My co-worker ran into my office that morning yelling something about a plane flying into the World Trade Center. I couldn’t understand what she was saying. It all too soon became clear.
We were told to leave work early. I went to a local restaurant with a couple of friends.
As hard as it was to witness the tragedy, I had much more on my mind than what was in the news. I had signed the separation papers that morning to start divorce proceedings with The Cowboy. He was to be served that afternoon. I dont think I’d ever felt any more alone or sad at any point in my life.
*Siiigh*
Coming out of teaching from 8-11 AM and not understanding why everyone looked so upset.
I found out right before my first graders came in for the day. I barely taught anything, all I can remember is frantically calling my parents and friends, praying that no one had been in a meeting in the towers that day. I felt so isolated in Kansas City and all I wanted to do was get in my car and drive home.
Explosion and tons of papers in the air. Someone joked that it’s too eary for Yankee’s parade. Going downstairs and seeing people running like crazy from the South Tower from the undeground level. The biulding itself did not look all that damaged – just couple of floors were may be in fire. Went back upstairs and prepared to keep working when we realized that I signed off my boss for a meeting in South Tower (I had a choice of Stock exchange but WTC was the closer.) Finally they told us to leave too and did not allow to take elevator. So, off I went down from 46th floor with all the books (I was in business school at that time.) Nobody ran, and people kept offering help. My crazy Italian friend kept blaberring that she saw a plane but nobody believed her – she is a professional drama queen. I was praying on the way down (I was mostly afraid of domino effect and my building is right across from South Tower.) I could not believe that I’m so lucky when we finally came down. I was already on Brooklyn bridge when we turned around and saw 1st building collapsing. People panicked and started running first. Then we saw military planes – crazy huge, they passed almost next to the bridge – that was the scariest part of the day. I thought that war had started. There were private cars waiting for us in Brooklyn on the other side of Brooklyn bridge. we managed to call home overseas – thank God I got through – all over the world TV programs got interupted announcing that New York was getting bombarded. We saw papers from WTC all the way in backyards in Brooklyn – it was a very bright but windy day. I actually initially thought that the fire spread up because of wind. At that stage we still did not know it was a plane.
It seems as if everyone felt a sense of disbelief. That’s mostly what I remember. I was working in a big office building, doing some stupid marketing piece, when we were all told to come into the break room to watch, and we saw the towers fall on TV. Work seemed kind of pointless after that.
I remember, I was driving to work. I remember where I was at the moment I heard the report of the first plane hitting. I went to work, in Alexandria VA. Later in the day, people were standing on the roof of my building watching the Pentagon burn. A good friend at the time who worked there just happened to have taken a vacation day and was safe at home. I remember, “all circuits are busy…” any time I tried to call home. I remember the next week in church, another good friend crying about how he lost his entire office of friends and coworkers at the Pentagon, while he was vacationing in Florida. He wondered why he was the only one in his department who was spared and suffered emense guilt. I imagine he probably still struggles. I remember the shock. I remember our country’s unity as we all scrounged for anything red, white and blue that we could tie to our vehicles. I remember that unity fading over time.
I remember sitting on my brother’s bed after the first plane hit and then watching with a mixture of horror and disbelief the second plane smash into the other tower. After that I called my ex and told him (he lived near NYC) and then I went in for my hospital volunteering shift. We were so convinced, so utterly sure that there would be survivors by the hundreds to deal with. So many that they would make their way north of the border to be treated. Even after they collapsed, I was certain that there would be a little group, dirty-faced and desperate huddled in the subway tunnels under the towers. But there weren’t. They were gone. All gone. A month later I was there, marveling at the peace march saying “Not in our Name”, reading the memorials, the missing posters. Crying at Ground Zero. When a woman said to me “don’t cry” I felt like punching her in the nose. Don’t cry? You’re standing next the grave of thousands of people some of whom were praying for rescue, some of whom were trying to answer those prayers and you’re telling me not to cry? For once, it wasn’t a tragedy on the other side of the world (where us North Americans usually perpetrate them) it was here. People we knew. People we loved. It was the beginning of a new era.
I remember the pilot coming out and thanking us for flying,
thanking us for taking a risk we never knew existed before The Day.
2726
I lived near DFW airport – I remember how quiet and lonely the skies looked for those few days after. Very odd feeling.
I remember stepping on a plane only two days later (the third flight out of DFW since the attacks) to go to a good friend’s wedding. That moment still ranks as one of the bravest in my life. It took all my guts and a lot of booze to not beg my husband to rent a car in Pittsburgh after the wedding and drive 30 hours home to Dallas. With every fiber of my being I did not want to get back on that plane – but I did it.
I remember the pilot coming on the intercom and asking that we offer a moment of silence as we flew over where Flight United 93 went down. He really didn’t need to ask. The only sound you heard on that flight were the attendants asking you how much you wanted to drink.
Em
I remember the phone ringing to wish me a happy birthday. I remember it ringing again an hour later to tell me to turn on the television.
I remember calling my friend who had recently moved back to Manhattan and not being able to get through to her. I remember calling her brother crying and frantic.
I remember the phone ringing around 1100am my time and her voice on the other end saying only my name. I remeber sobbing like a baby because she was alright and I knew it.
I remember the telemarketer calling and being told by my husband (at the time) to tell his supervisor that they needed to go home, we’re not sure what is happening in our world today.
I remember being exhausted and deciding with the neighbor across the street, who shared my birthday with me that we would from there on out never age!
I remember them all, the towers, the people, the scenes on t.v. I will never forget, never.
I was 5 months pregnant and it was 2 days after our 1 year anniversary. I was thinking the same thing you did. How can a bring a child into the world when things like this happen.
I remember getting the phone call from my husband’s friend asking if I had heard what happened. No, I said, what? The towers fell, there is nothing left. People are trapped and hundreds, maybe thousands, have died.
I think we had about 5 customers that day. I sat on the little stool in the pharmacy, in front of the automatic counting machine, listening to the radio wondering what would happen next. Then I remembered, my uncle worked at the pentagon. It was hours before we heard from him but he was fine.
I remember going home that night, not knowing what I would see. All I had that day was radio, I hadn’t seen any of the images. I will never forget what I saw on the screen that night. Hubby and I sat on couch holding each other close the rest of the night, thankful for what we had.
I remember thinking that I needed to see my parents…I thought there would be more attacks & was afraid I wouldn’t get to say my good-byes in time.
I am a teacher and I was in school at the time. The first plane hit while I was teaching but them I had my prep hour with no kids. The school secretary told me to turn on my tv. I say the second plane hit, then both buildings fall.
The most vivid memory I have is watching through my classroom window as plane, after plane landed that day. I am in the flight path near a major metro airport and we must have seen 100 planes land within 2 hours.
When the kids came back in they were dazed and had questions. Many parents came to pick their kids up from school that day.
I live in a highly arabic community and I was so very scared for my neighbors that night. Wishing and praying that they would be kept safe from the anger that we all felt at the time. I was praying to God that there wasn’t retaliation against them.
A very good friend of mine worked in the building near the World Trade Center complex. He was part of the masses walking accross the bridge to Brooklyn. His roomate emailed us all to let us know that he was safe. I remember that I couldn’t really believe it until I could hear his voice- which I did a few days later.
I watched TV nonestop I think for the next month. Unable to turn the channel. Needing to see it over and over in order for it to sink in. Sometimes I still don’t think it has.
I remember the girls in my class (I was in middle school) all crying and hugging each other and saying stuff like, “OHMYGOD WE MIGHT DIE CAUSE THE BAD PEOPLE MIGHT WANT TO DRIVE A PLANE INTO ALL OUR HOOUUUSSESSSSSSSSSS IF THIS HAPPENS IM SAYING GOOD BYE TO YOU MY DEAR FRIEND!!!!” Ugh, it was retarded….
Also, I remember…something didn’t seem quite right. I couldn’t put my finger on it..