Mommy Wants Vodka

…Or A Mail-Order Bride

It’s Never, EVER Safe To Sleep.

December1

I’m kinda feeling low today. I’m hoping to snap the fuck out of it and come back and actually string words together, instead of posting one of the creepiest videos ever.

Also: Other, Better Shit I’ve Written (a.k.a. I Get Around):

10 Ways To (Not) Entertain Your Kid On An Airplane. I have a feeling the comments will be troll-worthy.

7 of the Most Baffling Products Aimed At Parents

Holly Daze

And a repost of an old favorite: When “He’s My Dad” Makes Everyone Feel Awkward

posted under Aunt Becky Has VD
13 Comments to

“It’s Never, EVER Safe To Sleep.”

  1. On December 1st, 2011 at 10:44 am kadield Says:

    brb, calling my local Exorcist.

  2. On December 1st, 2011 at 10:48 am Brandon Says:

    I have a way you can snap out of it. Still disturbing in its own right, but hey, it’s not cows.

    Me. Painting. With my penis as a brush. It was, well, an experience…

    And yes, butt cheeks are included…

    I painted a picture with my penis, and THIS is the result (Warning: Butt-cheekery involved)

  3. On December 1st, 2011 at 11:12 am Lori (aka Bubbe) Says:

    Creepy! Hope you’re feeling better soon AB!

  4. On December 1st, 2011 at 12:17 pm Pete In Az Says:

    What’s wrong with kids on leashes?

  5. On December 1st, 2011 at 1:59 pm Jeans Y Says:

    That vid is disturbing – I couldn’t take my eyes off it!

  6. On December 1st, 2011 at 5:09 pm Mayor Gia Says:

    AHHHHHH SPIDERCOWS AHHHHHHHH.

    Someone hold me.

  7. On December 1st, 2011 at 5:35 pm melanie Says:

    hope you are able to get out of the funk today….

  8. On December 1st, 2011 at 7:03 pm JRose48 Says:

    I too am feeling funk-y. Hopefully I’ll feel better before I get all wrist slash-y.

  9. On December 1st, 2011 at 8:20 pm lisa Says:

    how could anyone with such a gift for words feel lonely i feel sad that it is helping with my recovery that someone i respect has the same feelings i do. thank you.

  10. On December 2nd, 2011 at 8:04 am Wombat Central Says:

    Oh Em Gee, where do you find this stuff? I liked the cows until things turned spidery. *shudder*

  11. On December 2nd, 2011 at 10:58 am nicki Says:

    What the hell did I just watch???? Ummmmm….feel better soon, K? =)

  12. On December 3rd, 2011 at 9:29 pm kate hyatt Says:

    It is the time of the year to feel low then high all in the same day. Hope you feel better.

  13. On December 5th, 2011 at 9:45 am Tegan Says:

    Ok seriously….my 4 year old daughter keeps asking me to play this….she finds the video hilarious!!!

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