Mommy Wants Vodka

…Or A Mail-Order Bride

Be Afraid, Be VERY Afraid


With the help of The Daver, I have now learned just how easy it is to put pictures up. It’s shamefully simple, and now I am ashamed of my ineptitude at all things electronic.

And I learned it all for YOU, Internet. Just for you. That’s how much your Aunt Becky loves you.

I present to you, without further Becky-Babble: Alex eats an Oreo:

(Does he look female to you? I don’t so much think so, but every single time, and I mean every single time, that we go out, someone always comments on what a (insert applicable adjective here) little girl we have. Doesn’t matter if he’s dressed head to toe in blue, people seem to think he looks feminine. Poor kid’s gonna get a complex. Especially when he learns that I put him in dresses as a baby (no, Daver, don’t worry, I don’t. Much.).)

And here is my hair, sadly without the frumptastical before picture:

But, dear Internet, you have no idea the beast that has been unleashed by my learning how to put pictures up here, no idea at all. Entries will now be peppered with gratuitous shots of such interesting slices ‘o’ life as “Wow, Lookit How Full of Crap Our Garage Is,” “Becky Eats Lunch (With Bonus Silverware!)” and “How Can Three Cats Excrete THAT Much Excrement?”

Ah, I take that all back, have no actual fear, I’m much too lazy to do that.


(cue evil laughter)

posted under I'm Big In Japan
23 Comments to

“Be Afraid, Be VERY Afraid”

  1. On January 7th, 2008 at 10:55 pm Juli Says:

    Awesome. Now ask him to show you how to size them so old broads like me can see them.

  2. On January 7th, 2008 at 11:15 pm Chris Says:

    He looks less like Dave. He doesn’t look any more like you, but he looks less like Dave.

  3. On January 7th, 2008 at 11:03 pm becky Says:

    Done and done. Now it’s frighteningly large. But I am far too lazy to attempt to do that again.


    Thanks, Juli!

  4. On January 8th, 2008 at 12:04 am Karen Says:

    When babies are that age they all look unisex unless you put some sort of a bow or other gender specific thing on him/her. Not that I am suggesting a bow for your little man. 🙂

    And I am excited you can do pictures now. They are good times. We got to get you vlogging next.

  5. On January 8th, 2008 at 12:07 am Juli Says:

    Love love love love love the streaks.

    Cute cute cute baby. And yeah, unless a kid is very gender-specific clothing, I usually can’t tell boy from girl either.

  6. On January 8th, 2008 at 12:08 am Juli Says:

    WEARING. <–insert where appropriate. (It’s late, I’m old.)

  7. On January 8th, 2008 at 6:48 am Amy Says:

    Your hair looks awesome! Great choice of coloring.

    I don’t think Alex looks like a girl, people are sometimes just too ignorant to notice what color clothing is on them. We recently bought my 10 month old nephew a blue t-shirt that says “I’m not a girl” on it and someone still came up to them in Target and said “Oh, your little girl has such beautiful eyes”

    By the way I think that Alex is absolutely adorable!

  8. On January 8th, 2008 at 8:17 am Melissa C Says:

    Alex? Something about his eyes is very “pretty”… but the rest of his face is all boy! Oh well.. at least he doesn’t have an uncle who would greet him with “so how’s my little Buddha?” like my daughter did as a baby! LOL (BTW… love those food-covered-baby shots! My Mom has one of me where I managed to get bbq sauce all over me, my high chair, the floor AND the walls behind me! It’s still my fave photo of me!)

    Hair? LOVE IT!!!! Absolutely gorgeous!

  9. On January 8th, 2008 at 9:02 am Cricket Says:

    I could just vaccuum those Oreos up. I agree, he has beautiful eyes, but he has a boy’s mischief.

    The hair is cool. Daring. Edgy. Such a hip Mama.

  10. On January 8th, 2008 at 9:15 am Kristine Says:

    Maybe it’s the eyes. But I think mostly that people have a child in their life that is of 1 sex, and they just assume all babies are of that sex. It seems people do the same with dogs. (Why yes one of our (female) dogs is always mistaken for a boy.)

  11. On January 8th, 2008 at 9:37 am MsPrufrock Says:

    I think Alex is very boy-looking, whatever that may mean. People are just stupid. My daughter, who is very feminine looking – delicate features, long, long eyelashes, big blue eyes, was always mistaken for a boy. She is generally wearing some amount of pink clothing too, clothing selection for babies/toddlers being what it is. It has even happened when she was wearing a big pink coat with small roses sewn on it. You can’t win.

    Well done on the hair. You need to do something to regain your youth and coolness, right? Not you personally, just a generic “you”. My plans are for an inside the wrist tattoo. I trust I will then be hip again.

  12. On January 8th, 2008 at 9:48 am Kristin Says:

    Hair is sass-tastic. Me likeys!

  13. On January 8th, 2008 at 10:18 am Pauline Says:

    Your hair looks amazing! And what a cute pic of Alex. And he doesn’t look like a girl. At least I didn’t think so when I saw him!

  14. On January 8th, 2008 at 10:35 am Gail Says:

    Hair looks fantabulous, Becky!

    And Alex looks fantabulouser!

    My first child was such a nice neat eater, but my second child looked remarkably like Alex (only with strained peas instead of yummy oreos) last night. On the other hand, when I feed him fruit, he doesn’t get it all over everything because he wants it all to go in his mouth.

    Baby’s first oreo won’t show up so much on Dino, but baby’s first bagel sure did! Black skin shows starch really well, and he rubs his bagels all over his face.

  15. On January 8th, 2008 at 10:36 am Gail Says:

    Hey, how cool! How did I do italics for the second half of my comment?

  16. On January 8th, 2008 at 10:40 am Kim Says:

    he looks like Alex. Cute as a button, not that he looks like an accessory on a coat, but you know what I mean.
    LOVE the hair, keep the pics coming.

    I’m proud of ya, Becks…good job! are you feeling more fabulous now, with the new hair do? it always works for me, but my hair doer lives/works 2.5 hours away from me in the winter, they have a cottage/cabin down the street in the summa….so….winter hair for me, gets lookin yuckTastic…I’ll have to make the drive soon, but with 2 lil ones and the ever present job, no time for the old Moms to get her hair did. *feel bad for me yet?* Well DON”T, cuz I’m going to see my favorite Viat Nameeeese woman, Jennifer (WTF), to get my nails did today at lunch, with the $$ I have saved from not purchasing the cancer sticks this week, I consider it a free manicure. *I can twist anything to my way of thinking*

    gotta run and do some work….’fore they get wise.

  17. On January 8th, 2008 at 10:41 am Kim Says:

    how was that for a fuckin mess of a paragraph?

  18. On January 8th, 2008 at 11:45 am Emily R Says:

    I can never, ever tell what sex a baby is. They just look like babies. This one has particularly beautiful eyes, I will say.

  19. On January 8th, 2008 at 12:20 pm becky Says:

    Thanks, guys! I’m totally blushing right now. The picture of my hair doesn’t look nearly as vibrant as it does in real life, so I am going to try and take a better shot!

    Alex has my eyes and is starting to look just like my father (minus the dark coloring), who is NOT feminine in any way, but people just crack me up about this. (if) when I correct them and tell them that Alex is a boy, they’re always far more embarrassed than I would be. Babies look like babies to me, and I don’t feel slightly guilty if I assign them the wrong sex. But usually, I say “oh what a cute BABY” rather than assign gender. It’s easier for me.

  20. On January 8th, 2008 at 2:53 pm kbreints Says:

    You are so funny! And your son is gorgeous. My youngest too is a very pretty baby boy– nothing wrong with that. That is what they call Gerber babies! If people are calling him a her when he is dressed in Blue– and very obviously a boy- they need check themselves.

  21. On January 8th, 2008 at 4:50 pm Jenn Says:

    Yay, hehe. I’m most excited for the cat excrement entry. 😉
    Alex looks like a boy. He is extra adorable!! A lot of people think extra cute equals girl for some reason. Plus (and I think someone up there said it) people really do tend to automatically say boy/girl depending on what gender their youngest child is. I always play it safe and say, “Oh my goodness, what a cute BABY” though, haha. Or I ask the child’s name (although with a name like Alex, it’s still up in the air I suppose). People would ask me what my son’s name is (it is Riley) and then I could tell they were still confused and thinking, “Hmm.. but is it a boy or a girl?”

  22. On January 8th, 2008 at 10:15 pm becky Says:

    I’ll be compiling an amazing cat crap story to leave everyone riveted to their screens, Jenn. All for you!

    I, too play it safe and try to say “baby” rather than assign gender to something I don’t know OR care about.

  23. On January 9th, 2008 at 12:13 am Lindz Says:

    Hi Becky.
    Alex is very cute. My son also has big brown eyes, and because he has long hair, that I chose not to cut. He is also always mistaken as a girl. everyone is always like what a cute/pretty little girl you have? and I always retaliate, thank you, yes, he is a very handsome boy, and then they get all purse lips, and are like, oh!

Email will not be published

Website example

Your Comment:

My site was nominated for Best Humor Blog!
My site was nominated for Hottest Mommy Blogger!
Back By Popular Demand...